Having fun on stage

Been enjoying my time on stage lately. Basically been messing around, trying new jokes. Some of them work, others not so much. My style has been changing, and the jokes I write I enjoy, but crowds don't seem to enjoy them as much. I'm not sure if that's really what's going on or that's just my perception. Talked to one of my comedy friends who's moved to L.A. He told me he recently got a college agent. Good for him, he's a funny dude, so I'm happy for him. Been in a really weird mood lately. The ex has been randomly texting with me. I imagine she's just fucking with me, as she has no interest in getting back together. This breakup has been so hard on me. It's really taken a toll on me. With her I at least had something to look forward to. Now it's just misery. This comedy thing likely will never pan out. But I don't know what else I could possibly do with my life. It's really scary. Maybe I should just move home and give up the dream. Who knows.

Why oh why would you tell me that?

So I made it the last 3 days without day drinking. I mean I worked 2 of them and had a mid afternoon meeting the other one, but a win is a win. Gotta take small gains. I have been drinking less at night as well. Such a struggle, I hate it. As for the title one of my roommates friends felt the need to bring up my ex today. Why do people do that? Nobody wants to talk about their ex. Not only did he ask me that, he told me he saw that she was in a relationship with a black guy. Ummmmm thanks, for ruining my day and evening and week. I of course send her a text, to which she denies it. I have to believe it I suppose. I think she still has love and care for me, but simply hates me. She pictures me as a monster. That is a tough feeling. I'm an alcoholic but I am in no way a bad person. I know that for sure. Shitty person, never be a husband, sure, but I am a good person.I'm still on the fence on whether or not she is in a relationship, and even when I heard it, although hurt, I was ok with it I guess. It's the replaced again feeling. I suppose I will never get over what happened with my ex. I am in capable of feeling loved and good enough. It's a deep pain that may never go away. I need someone that will accept me as I am, but first I need to accept myself. How can someone love me when I hate myself. Oh well. I leave my phone in my car at night. Just protects me from texting her. She deserves a better life without me. Poker's been fun. Sunday I went up with Jesse at the Store. First time we've tried it there. We got 16 minutes which is fun. It wasn't polished or great but I think the crowd opened up and enjoyed us. Monday was the open mic. 45 people in the crowd. Better than most of our Best of show's and the best open mic I can recall in awhile. One guy brought a bunch of people and a girl was shooting a documentary and she brought a good amount of people too. I did an actual set for the most part, on top of messing around a little bit. I liked it. The girl shooting the vid complimented me a few times. She's way too cute to do comedy. Esp. cause she talks about not being able to get men, ya ok lady.

Slight mental lapse

Thursday was the Store. I went up 2nd. It was a weird crowd. There was a black guy that was the show promoter. He sat in the back. There was a group of about 8 black guys that I tried to sit in the middle of the crowd. They sat down for a bit, then went to the back to sit with their comic friend. It made it for a divided crowd. They weren't laughing much at set up punch line jokes. I adjusted rather quickly and had a pretty solid set. One comic went after me and just destroyed this one woman who was just drunk and trying to be a part of the show. She wasn't really that bad and he tore into her. The comics were dying laughing and they let him go for as long as he wanted. I felt it really ruined the show for comics after him. Everyone in charge there has no sense of comedy. Friday was Winston's. It was raining which always effects the amount of people that attend the show. One of the headliners told me earlier in the week that she wouldn't be there. The other headliner pretty much shit on the show for 12 minutes. I still paid him $50, oh well. I went up with Jesse for my set. We did about 12 minutes. It was fun, just sucked one of the mics kept cutting in and out. After the show we went to the Harp and I smoked a little bit. I remember not being too drunk and having a very good time. I ended up getting too drunk as I often do. I went over to Hugo's but when he went to bed I stumbled back over to the ex's. Stupid stupid decision. I called her a few times, then stumbled to my car to sleep in there. I forgot my glasses at Hugo's so when I woke up in the morning I walked back to his house to sleep a bit. I'm still day drinking, it's pathetic. Luckily I have some things to keep me busy this week, work tomorrow, meeting Tuesday, etc. Saturdays Store shows were night and day. The first crowd was amazing, everyone did great. The 2nd show was the drunkest group of people I've seen in a long time. Most of them should not have been let in. I kept telling people to be quiet but they kept on talking. I was prepared to get a verbal lashing at the end of the night, but luckily that didn't happen. That was the worst I've seen it be. The headliner told us to let them chat, but if it was too much he'd tell us to throw them out. We threw out about 4 groups of people. A couple just left and sat in the lobby after complaining about people talking. I was pretty defenseless as I told the manager we need to throw people out and he didn't follow up.

Moving along

Sunday at the Store was slow, but more importantly the crowd did not want to laugh, like at all. It was weird, I went up 3rd cause 2 people were late. After I saw the first 2 comics bomb kinda hard, I knew I didn't want to do a normal set. I asked one of the other comics if he'd come on stage and let us try to raffle him off. I brought him up, the gag went fine, even though he tried to basically sabotage it by not speaking. Not sure why in his comedic brain he found this to be a good idea. It was really annoying. The crowd laughed a little bit, and someone told me I was their favorite. Monday was the Store open mic. I thought it may get cancelled again as there was 2 people in the crowd at 755 but a group came in to support one guy. They let the comics do 4 minutes but stopped the list at 20 comics, which ended up being 21. My set was fun. Did some jokes, and attempts to speak to the crowd with no response. Either way my set was fun as always on Mondays. Tuesday I did a charity show in P.B. There was a good amount of people there. I started off pretty strong, but lost them somewhere in the middle. I think a lot of people started to enter the bar and talking. It was pretty distracting. I got through my 20 minutes and watched Jesse. He struggled with all the people talking as well, and bailed early. Wednesday was Winston's contest. There was a decent crowd, 20 or so people. We had 5 black comics, one mexican, one iraqi?, and one half white comic. Pretty crazy. I didn't plan it that way just happened. Everyone did pretty ok. It was between 5 people, and judges vote made a difference. After Winston's I cruised over to Bar 11. Jesse and I went up together. We only got 5 minutes and it went by extremely fast. I can't remember a set every seeming so fast. Even when I was doing 3 minutes I'd still find myself glancing over at the light. It was a lot of fun and I think we should start trying that a little more often.

Picking up the pieces

So seems things with the ex are done for good. Thursday she texted me over and over again that she hated me, wanted to spit in my face, and never wanted to see me again. It was incredible mean and hurtful. She is upset that I hung out with the other girl, even though she was dating. Pretty rediculous claim. She said something to the effect that she was testing me, to see if I'd hang with her or something like that. Pretty crazy. I am not strong enough mentally to be with her. She is too serious, too intense. I wish we could just be two people and have fun. That's how things were at the start. Put there were too many rules, I was unhappy. I couldn't please her. My alcoholism obviously has a lot to blame about the relationship falling apart. But I can admit my mistakes, and want to change. I know she never will. She will make someone happy but that person, I know now will not be me. I tried Friday to come to some sort of truce but it was just more spiteful hate. We don't get along, can't find a common ground. We were just too different. I am in a better place than last week. Still drinking more than I ever have, and don't know how to kick it. I'm meeting with my friend who goes to AA tomorrow. Hopefully she can help me. I also researched some day time AA meetings. I might check one out this week. I'm just afraid I will just get more depressed than I already am. I need to make a change and the time is now. Comedy has been going great, esp. financially. Had the best week of the year this past one. I still think I need to get a day gig one or two days a week. Something to get my mind off things and not allow me to drink. They offered me a split shift at work 6-9, then 330-6, but it almost isn't worth it. I'll see how the next few weeks play out. If I can make headway on the drinking problem. Thursday I did a show at a Navy base. It was a little weird cause all the lights were on and it was in a conference hall. I messed around for the most part and think I got a pretty solid reaction. Did mostly the basics with mixed in crowd work. Friday was Winston's. I had a feeling it was gonna be busy and I was right. My set was a roller coaster, but ended strong. Always a fight, but I was happy about it. Saturday was back at the Store. It was likely one of the best crowds for a weekend in awhile. Everyone did well. The open normally struggles but he did well. The feature has the hackiest, dumbest jokes but crowds eat it up. The headliner was either high or drunk or both but he was slurring about everything. It was crazy he still remembered his 45 plus minute set. I heard he really struggled the night before, the crowd loved him.

Had some fun

Sunday was the Store. I went up somewhat early. I followed a dude that did a joke, and I made myself a part of it. It worked on Thursday, Sunday I dragged it out too much. That will be the last time I do it. I chatted with the girls in the front a bit. It was a pretty solid set throughout. Monday the open mic at the Store got cancelled because there was 0 audience members. Tuesday there was no show either. Both days I spent alone drinking vodka and being miserable. Wednesday morning I called my Mom, crying beyond belief. I need to get out of this funk, not sure how long it's going to take. I'm still having trouble getting past the "perfect" comment. I just can't believe the two girls I loved threw me out so damn quickly. It really hurts me. Last night at Winston's was pretty busy. The open mic ran long, but the crowd was pretty solid. Everyone did well. The right people advanced in my mind. The commentary was hilarious as always.

Crushed beyond comedy

I have never felt so depressed and lost. The ex got into this, somehow. And took my writings in the total wrong way. She doesn't understand the pain I'm in and what I'm doing to cope. She has this assumption that I was hanging out with the old friend as a possible love interest and that is not the case. I hung out with her, as I've stated before because we connect. She accepts me for me, something I went a year and half without feeling. Do I like me, no. But it is nice to hang out with someone without judgements. It was meant to ease me back into reality of being alone again. The ex acted like this crushed her, blah, blah. Only to find out she's been dating one or more men. When she called, even though it wasn't great, I thought there was hope. I even told the new girl, I thought it was best if we took a break as I was trying to make it work with the ex. All for nothing. I lost both my friend and the ex for the future. Even after the first ex left me for someone else, we were at least 3000 miles away and had gone back and forth about breaking up for years. I was still hurt that someone could move on from me so quickly. But this one stings more than I could ever imagine. I can't even talk about it without crying. I'm thinking seriously about just packing it in and quitting it all. I don't think I can live in San Diego or do comedy any longer. I don't think I can move on. I want to get better, put my life back on track, but I know I'll never be able to do it alone. I have come to the realization that the recent ex literally wants to break me down to nothing. She acted like she was jealous and angry when in all reality she's been seeing a new guy. And what stings the most is the fact she felt the need to tell me he was "perfect on paper." Oh and also he has abs. Good for you, get everything you want in one great package. She's also doing this body challenge online. Ok great, you're so happy and better without me, thanks for reminding me how pathetic I am. Everything she wanted, everything I'm not and likely never will be. I'm crying as I write this. I'll never be a man someone will marry, ever. I will always just be second best. A starter boyfriend. Never good enough for someone to be proud of. Never a man a girl would be proud to introduce to her friends and family. I'm just a pathetic clown. Pathetic alcoholic, a friend, a fool. I've never felt so worthless. To be replaced so quickly yet again. I'm not memorable, I'm not worth fighting for, or second chances. Time to pack it in and give up the "dream" that will never happen. I was doing better. Going without speaking to her. I hung out with the new friend to help me move on because that's what's best for her. I know being with her is best for me. I broke down and told her my reasons for being the way I was. I never felt good enough, ever. She reassured me of that daily. And the fact she's with the new "perfect" man so quickly proves my thinking. I can't see things getting better for me anytime soon unless I make a major change. I just can't believe I'm being replaced again by a man they will marry. I know it's for the best, her family, friends, and even she hated me. I should have never even bothered to get better. All it's led to is disappointment. I tried to create the man I know she wanted, I wanted. All the while I was being replaced, and there was no thought of getting back together. A false hope. Which I guess was better than no hope at all. Now every moment is a blur, a wasted fragment of time. At least I had a marriage to look forward. Now there is no sure thing, nothing is consistent other than sadness and alcoholism. Good for her, way to fuck with my brain and heart. I'm proud of you. I survived the first break up, I'll survive this one. But this one is going to take a long time. It's the false caring that has crushed me the most. The attempt to feign interest, all the while with someone else. Allowing me into their home only to tell me about this "perfect" man. I may be a shitty human, but I am the same shitty human to everyone. Both girls portrayed themselves to be these great people. Everyone told me you have to get them back, they're these great people. Do great people really spit on people's hearts? Do they listen and watch someone pour their hearts out to them and stare blankly into their eyes. No emotion, no concern? Is that what great is. I live everyday with people thinking I'm this horrible person. But I have a heart, one that can be used, thrown out, and replaced without concern. What to do with my days other than drink and forget reality. Comedy, what really is the point? I want to start talking more about my life but nothings funny about a miserable alcoholic. It's nothing but couple's that attend the shows. And while I'm working I have to see these happy couples, these "perfect" men. I'm seating people for $8 an hour, to get my 8 minutes. Should I just quit the Store, try to find an investment job, to be that "perfect" man. Someone a girl could be proud of. I can't recall ever being happy in my life. My entire life. Middle school I dealt with obesity. High school I dealt with being really skinny, and being weird around women. College I had the first gf. We had a long distance, often fighting relationship. I loved her so much, but she just never felt the same. Didn't want to say good night. Than I had the 5 or so years of being single. Dated girls here and there but nothing serious. Just couldn't find someone I totally gelled with. Then the most recent ex. It started off like a fairy tale. Then I guess I happened. Vegas happened. We should have just ended things then. No one could accept me for that person. I should have got myself in gear and wanted to change then, but I just didn't feel the support. It wasn't her place but I wanted the ultimatum. I wanted her to leave me. It took the break up for me to want to get into gear, and now she doesn't want me back. Guess it's my fault. I'm a very depressed person. I need a strong person in my life to get me going. And while the ex is a strong, supportive person. She was also set in her ways. As cliche as it sounds I would have taken a bullet for her. Her life is so much more meaningful than mine. But in no way would I expect, nor think she'd do that for me. And I know the woman that I will marry will do that. I need that support. I need someone to accept me for who I am. Someone that will force me into sobriety. The reason I always left when we fought, wasn't to break up, it was to get away. Get away from the anger. It was always me feeling inferior. Always less of a person because of my battle with alcohol. She acted like she wanted me to quit but offered mimosa's and champagne brunches, come on. She was always first, always the better person. I know we weren't right, but I will always wonder if we could have been if I got sober. I offered to try it for a month. It would be great to know for sure, plus it would help me get clean for a month. But she shot this down. You "care," really about who you? Ok then. Enjoy the "perfect" man. I reached for help with the only person I know could help, and I was shot down. So it's just me now. Sunday was the Store. I don't recall exactly how things went, but I think I got a pretty decent spot. Can't remember anything good or bad so that's a win at least. Monday was back at the Store for the open mic. I went up somewhat early and worked on some jokes. It was fun as always, and some lady comic said I was very smart and funny. That was nice. Wednesday was back at Winston's. There was a good amount of people there when I arrived. They were there because the bar is celebrating it's 25 year anniversary and they had $1 beers before 6. Most of the people trickled out by the time the contest started. Which only 5 of the contestants showed up. Two at least told me, one just no showed. I advanced everyone. Thursday was back at the Store. I followed a comic and played on his joke. That went very well. Even got an applause break. That was cool. I couldn't reach that climax after that, but it was a fun set regardless. Friday was the finals. I saw the ex during the day, which led to absolute crushing my soul. I felt then and still do like a zombie. I wake up every morning at 6 am and stare into the darkness that is my life. I went there with the impression there was still a chance, at least a strong friendship. Pled my case how weak I was and how much I needed her, to which she reacted by telling me about the "perfect" man, who would be taking her out later that night. I cried to her face to which she stared. People are not who they want you to believe. Love doesn't leave that way for good people. True love lasts forever. But maybe that's just for good people. Maybe I'm not deserving of second chances, of ever lasting love. So I went to Winston's dead inside and hosted to the best of my ability. The show was packed, the winner was well deserving, and I made some money. I got some food, met a friend for a drink, and went to sleep. I battled my brain who wanted to get a bottle of wine, but I didn't. I went to sleep. Is it a step in the right direction, maybe? Still woke up and texted the ex. Only to get a response hours later that it's my responsibility to clean up my act. Man up, and move on. Thanks "caring" person. Is that really whats best for us, ok then. Saturday I zombied all day and went into work. Luckily I didn't have to open either show. The line up was whatever. The first girl was just there. She's cute, but as far as comedy, come on, pathetic. The second guy does a lot of impressions. He's talented for sure, but has done the same exact jokes every time I've seen him. Which is slightly weird for the younger comics, but it works for him very well. Plus he mixes the order and sells them very well. The headliner was a party style comic. He was reading off his phone a bunch, to which one girl yelled, "I like comedy that flows, not someone reading off their phone." They came with a group of 10 and were somewhat a pain all night. They barely laughed so not sure why they chose to attend a comedy show. He was very nice, but I heard when he got in his car that this was the worst audience that he can remember.

Had some shows, made some money

A lot of shows have been going on but it's all been a blur. Life stuff have been happening and I've been putting a lot of focus into that. Still battling the demons with alcohol and going back and forth if I want to rekindle things with the ex. I spoke with her a little bit the past few days. I guess she was sick. I'm not sure if she actually misses me or just needs someone to fill her time. I do honestly want to give it one more shot if I do it completely sober. I think it will be good for me to test myself to see if I actually could not drink. Plus I could know for sure we are not right for one another. I'm trying, but I'm not pushing the issue. I'm also talking to a couple other girls and actually been hanging with one. Things have been getting somewhat serious. It's with the Vegas girl that I've always felt like I had some kind of connection with. Problem is she smokes, and has put on a few pounds. And I'm going back and forth if this is someone I could openly date. I do like her, and she likes me. And that should be enough. But, there's also the idea that I think our lives would spiral down an unhealthy alcoholic path. She is very much like me. She finds me funny, like really funny. That is great. We have great conversations. I don't know what I'll do in the end. I know if I get back with the ex it will kill any chance with the new girl. Also, if I pursue the new girl that will end things with the ex. I think I'd have a better, more successful future with the ex. But in the present, I know the better decision would be to focus and allow myself to like the new girl. Who knows. I do want to clean up the drinking, and know with the new girl that may never happen. Comedy's been a roller coaster. Been getting frustrated with some people at the Comedy Store, and watching unfunny people get big laughs from the audience. I've been having some good sets. I did 15 minutes at the Store Thursday. I did about 13 and couldn't think where I wanted to go next. i had plan to do a new set but the crowd was so rowdy I chose to just do my set. It went well and I had some fun interactions with the crowd. Friday at Winston's I told a few stories about one night stands and when I thought I was gonna overdose on weed. Had a guy come up to me after to say I was funny which is always nice. Were kicking off a new contest this Wednesday. This will be the 8th one. Well be moving to Thursdays starting in December. I think this may help. We had hoped the Street Fair would help draw in more people but sadly that was only the case one or two weeks. I think Winston's could do a better job promoting the show, but what can you do. We have the finals of the next one this Friday. I'm expecting it to be busy. It's great cause the prize money is already taken care of, so I should get a majority of the door. Had a pretty profitable week and I'm hoping that will continue for the rest of the year. None of the Store people got to technically open the last few weeks. Last week there was a gaggle of young, in my mind horrible comics. It was painful to watch. I'm getting frustrated that maybe this dream may never happen. The comic last night had a great stage presence. His jokes weren't amazing, but he definitely sold them like they were. He repeated the premise by yelling which I thought was interesting. He hung out, and took pictures after which I thought was cool. I'm getting so tired of how they treat the door guys. Like were pee ons, deserving of nothing. Even the door guy that serves once in awhile gets treated much better. I don't know if they just look down at us just because we want to do comedy or what it is. Very frustrating. Tuesday I headlined the open mic at ACC. The owner who normally talks to me didn't say a word. He''s likely pissed I haven't hit him up for weekend spots. He is a shady dude and cancelled a show just because people only brought 24 humans. Just bad business. I've been doing a little day drinking this week, so I had one beer before I went on stage and felt a little tipsy. I was just messing around on stage and felt I was funny enough.

Spending time at the Store

Saturday I worked at the Store. They brought their own opener so none of us got to go up. I thought the first guy was pretty funny, kinda awkward but found him funny enough. The 2nd and 3rd comics were unwatchable. The girl recently headliner at the Comedy Palace, and the dude regularly opens for Jeff Garlin. They are terrible, and the worst comics I've seen in that spot to date. People were wondering how long he was doing. His stage presence is almost unwatchable. Both their material was beyond moronic and hacky. I couldn't bare to watch it was so terrible. It was a moment in time where I really thought about quitting, not only the Store, but comedy in general. I don't know if my style will ever work. It's very frustrating, and almost depressing. The headliner was from workaholics. He did a great job knowing how to teeter the inappropriate line, but not going too far. He is also mixed race, and discusses it, but never actually says what he is. I found that a very cool trick to keep the audience on edge. I thought he was my second favorite headliner so far. Sunday at the Store was pretty slow. I went up early as usual. There was a group that wanted to sit in the front, so people could talk to them. I opened my set by chatting with them a bit. It was good and bad. I did ten minutes and it was a roller coaster. I enjoyed it. Monday was the open mic. As always my favorite show of the week. I did more jokes than I normally do, but still chatted with the crowd a bit. I had a guy ask to take a picture with me. That's never happened before other than family. He was there on his birthday which is very weird to me.

Maine, NYC, and back again

So, I've returned home safely from my cross country trip. I have to say it was a good time. I failed at taking a break from drinking. I took one night off and literally was up all night. I in turn headed into NYC for about 8 hours, including seeing the Letterman taping and walking all over Manhattan and Central Park. I overheard a convo from a guy trying to hit on the girl. I couldn't help but laugh. She heard me and chatted in up with me. She was a dance instructor and a member of the ROCK Church over there. It was uplifting that their are pretty, intelligent women out there. I have been doing well with avoiding contact with the ex. I'm sure we'll eventually speak again, but I really have no remorse about leaving her. I wrote letters to the 3 essential women in my life. I really had very few nice things to say about her. I don't know what I feel this hate, but I really have so many negative memories about her. I think I will move past her rather quickly, I hope anyways. I did miss her when I was spending time with family and they were asking about her. But she made it pretty clear that she's already been on multiple dates, including having sex on the first date. This is the same thing Kathy did. I refuse to let myself fall down that kind of path again. I don't know why women can move past me so quickly. It is what it is. I am far from perfect, but I am a good, caring soul. I'll find someone who accepts me for me, and I will be happy. As far as the trip. The Comedy Connection is closed, which appears to be for good. I decided to check out the open mic we showcased at a few years back. It was very poorly run. I approached the guy asking how much time we got or where there was a light. He basically said no light, and 6-8 minutes. I watched as the host sang songs and did 3 minutes between comics. Comics who by the way were doing at least 10 minutes. They were telling random girlfriend jokes. And other rather hacky jokes. When I went up there and tried my bits it just didn't go well. First off the host told the last few comics they basically would have negative time. I got a few chuckles, but was by far not a good set. I walked out the door, licked my wounds, and moved on. It was a case of they were all friends and I was an outsider and didn't have a chance. I could have taken a different approach as it was as open mic but oh well. Next time. Tuesday I did a show in New York at the Creek and Cave. I got lost at first but made it. Had to go to the bathroom, but could not find a public restroom to save my life. Finally went in the basement of this place and lit it up. It was gross. Anyways when I walked in before 8 there looked to be a good crowd. There was a 6,8 and 930 show at this place. Come to find out the 6 show was just an open mic and all the people in the crowd were comics. They filed out rather quickly. There was about 15 people, including comics when I went up. Some jokes did ok. Wasn't a killer set but I was happy with it. The hosts went up together which I thought was a cool thing. That worked well off each other like Jesse and I. Wednesday I did a show in Greenwich Village near the Comedy Cellar. I got lost once again and headed the opposite was even though I was 3 minutes from the place. I had my friend look up directions and I made it. Was a little panicked cause I was suppose to be there by 930, and arrived closer to 935. The dude that put me on seemed to not care about being late. They were suppose to start at 8 but started closer to ten. When I went in there was 7 people in the audience, 3 Americans, 2 people from Holland, and 2 ladies from Venezuela. One girl popped in and left, then 2 girls came in, and left. They have guys outside called "Barkers" that try to convince people to come into the show. I saw them strike out for the most part. I believe they have fun doing it. My set was fun. Jokes didn't work at all, but I had fun doing crowd work. It was tough because basically all of the comics did crowd work. I realized more than ever that I need more relate-able jokes. I wrote 15 pages since I saw gone. Mostly stories about my life, and all the one night stands I've had. Also, I expanded the speed dating joke. I am going to try them next week at the Store. Need to read them over, but I feel confident they will get laughs. Tonight was Winston's. It was nice to return to that stage. I had fun doing the show. There was a decent crowd, not big laughers, but they did enjoy some people. For my set I rambled off a bunch of 80's movies and sitcoms, and made up how I masturbate to them. It got some laughs. I don't know if it would work in a club. I think if they were splattered in a set it would work best. Joke, do one, joke again.

Lotta shows and depression

Well I've been going through a break up with the ex. It was my decision and while I do think it's the right decision for both our futures. It does suck a lot right now. My days are very boring. I just stay in bed, sulk, and try to fight off the urge of drinking. I saw her on Saturday and she looked great. We talked. I thought then it could work, but even then she wasn't asking anything about me, and just ignored what I said. I pretty sure she's also already been intimate with another dude. I think she was just screwing with my head. I had a vivid dream last night that I walked in on her with another guy. I jumped out of bed and contemplating started to drink. I decided to go see her. She let me in, but it was not like Saturday. When I saw her, I smiled, she just said "what?" I asked her about the guy to which she laughed and refused to answer it. We went back and forth for about 15 minutes, and I ended up just leaving. I can soberly not be the first to contact her anymore. She is over me, and I need to strength myself. Drinking is always a problem. I did take a day off and am going to focus on getting away from hard stuff. That is my goal. I head home tomorrow so I want to show the best Jeff I can. As far as shows. Sunday, I believe I followed a dude that does a lot of asian jokes, and I apologized to the person in the front row. The set was then a mixture of crowd work and jokes. I know I did the break up joke and like what has happened before some gal yelled maybe she'll take you back. It was a funish set. Monday was the Store open mic. The crowd was pretty dead as always, and I intended to try a bunch of jokes, but ended up talking with one guy in the front. I had no direction, I opened with how are you, to which a guy that went up earlier, yelled yes from the back. I ended up talking to him for most of my set. I somewhat fell like I'm wasting my and the clubs time when I do that, but no one has told me not to. Tuesday was the Palace competition. I had a somewhat difficult round. 3 people that are funny and have done it longer than me, plus a bringer. It was kinda sketchy as the show was suppose to start at 8, but started at 820. The problem is that most of the bringers people came after 8, and if the show started on time they wouldn't be able to vote. Kinda lame. But I pretty much phoned my set in and didn't advance. I really wasn't that affected. Obviously, I want to advance, but I'm not going to win the thing, and that's all that matters. Next was Til Two. When I arrived there was a good crowd. I've had a tough time the last few times I was there so I was excited. I was the headliner and went up last. I was suppose to do twenty minutes but I saw what I thought was the light but ended up just being a camera flash. I was kinda bummed as I chatted with a comic earlier about doing longer sets. I ended up only doing 13. I did well, but for some reason I just can't catch as break. Wednesday was Winston's then Beachwood. Winston's was pretty dead. Sadly our run of having people come in early has ended. Were talking about moving the contest back to Mondays for the next one but that's a lot of competition. There's already 2 open mics that night on top of the Madhouse contest. I'll get comics, but doubt I can get some that draw, considering the Madhouse contest has such better prizes. Maybe Thursday would be better. I will try to get that date. Beachwood was surprisingly more fun that I had expected. I was on the drink tab so that's always good. Sadly I drank way too much to be driving home. That's really depressing. I am in no way proud of that. My set was fun. Jokes and crowd work were used. I actually accidentally got a table kicked out. That was kind of awkward as the bouncer went over and told them to leave as I'm struggling to make it through. It was kinda funny I went up before a comic I'm far better than but oh well. I get no respect around this town. People said they enjoyed my set. Thursday was the Store and I honestly can't remember how that set went. Friday was Winston's. There was a good amount of people but they did not want to laugh. They were there for the two features. One Mexican and the other PB white boy. The Mexican posted the next day of facebook how the show wasn't what he expected and needed a break. My set was just horrible. I was more sober than I usually am. But I couldn't have felt more miserable on stage. I want to get off right away but I struggled through and that's a skill in itself. A few people did well by just talking to the crowd, but that's all that worked. Saturday was the Store. I got to open the first show to a sold out crowd of 199. It was the most talented line up since I've been working there. All 3 are touring comedians. Steve Simeone, Steve Rannazzisi, and Ari Shaffir. My set went somewhat ok. I expected more from a huge crowd. Some lady said she enjoyed my set. I don't think the guys did as well as I thought they would. If a crowd of 200 can be tough, they were. I closed the show out well which is something I've been working on. Sunday I did a country club in Carlsbad. I made a little money and got some food. I was offered free drinks but the last time I saw the guy I got so wasted I passed out and pissed on his futon. His wife brought it up the first thing. It was really embarrassing and I didn't feel comfortable drinking out front of them. I sat outside and nearly was in tears thinking about my struggle with alcohol. It also brought me back to the show I did at his house was the first time Lindsey and I broke up. Sunday I thought we had a chance to rekindle it, but it's just not meant to be. My set was ok. Started off well, but kind of lost them as I went on. They were a bunch of rich white people. I'm not really great in that environment. I was struggling to think what joke I wanted to do next. Monday was back to the Store open mic. That day I wrote a bunch "do you ever masturbate" insert random show or movie. Some did well, some not so much. After that I tried to remember the redneck and crackas jokes but couldn't for the life of me. I had fun with the set, and think I can filter in those masturbate jokes into another set. Tuesday was Lestat's. I thought I'd get 15 minutes, then I saw I was the feature and thought maybe I'd get 20-30. I text the dude and he says 10-12. Ok then. I don't really mind but goes back to getting some respect. The headliner was running late so I got to do 15 minutes. I was thinking after what jokes I would have went into next. I think at my Comedy Store show I am going to do 25 minutes. It would be a good challenge and I think I can. My set started off strong and trailed off a little bit as I continued. I wasn't happy with the ending but oh well.

Lot of work and some comedy

Sunday was the Store. My set was ok. Wrote like 4 new jokes, and tried 3 of them. One worked, one started ok, the 3rd didn't get much a response. I sprinkled in some old stuff, and closed with some crowd work to end decent. Monday was back at the Store for the open mic. I tried a bunch of jokes, most of them did decent. I worked with the crowd a little bit, and basically just made fun of the night. Tuesday I worked at the Store and did not perform. One of the workers opened the show and did the worse on the show, which is crazy because most of the others were new to comedy. One comic asked if he could film, I said no, he asked why I just said it's policy. When he got on stage I could see his gf sitting weird. I had a feeling she was filming. I went behind her, and sure enough she was. I told her to stop. I don't really care, I just don't like shady people. Wednesday was Winston's. The contest was ok. There were a few people in the audience, and with the new window installed, it adds a different dynamic. People can watch/ heckle from outside. The voting was close. One of the comics stayed until the end, but left right before I brought the comics back on stage. This was a pretty stupid move, as people rarely can remember people's names. He ended up getting 5th place and not advancing. After Winston's I did a set at the Whistle Stop. It was pretty awkward. I followed a sketch. I started off pretty bad, I battled and ended ok but didn't feel good about it. A few of the comics said I did well, but they were just being nice. The comics after me messed around on stage a lot and that seemed to work out much better. One of the bookers told me how the other comics that had opened in month's past had a tough time as well. I talked to the other booker about maybe putting one comic on before the first comic, to ease the crowd into stand up. He pretty much said they do the show for the sketches and don't really care about comedy. They book comics from L.A. to try to make contacts for shows up there. I guess if there's one way to do it, you might as well put on a show you enjoy in exchange for stage time. Thursday was the Store. I went up pretty late into the night and basically did all crowd work. Added a few jokes, but for the most part I talked to a table in the front and made fun of one of the comics that brought most of the people. The crowd was very small. Friday was back at Winston's. There was a decent amount of people in the crowd. I didn't do a set as the comic before me talked about all the lesbians there, as well as eating butt and scissoring. I was too uncomfortable to do jokes. Saturday was back at the Store. First show was somewhat packed. All the comics did really well. Second show was small, about 40 people. Still all the comics did well. The last comic said she was only 30 which I wanted to believe was a lie as she's already headlining but I read an article that she was on about 30 comics to watch under 30. I have to keep plugging away. Talking to one of the comics that lives in L.A. he kept stressing how a move would make so much sense, don't wait. He was saying L.A. is bad for comedy but good if you want to do T.V. and whatnot. I realized San Diego is actually better for stand up than L.A. I really only want to do comedy unless I get a Seinfeld like show where I was head writer or the main star. I don't want to do bit parts here and there. I think a move to L.A. in like April 2014 would be pretty smart. I'd been doing comedy 5 years, and I would be comfortable in all environments, plus Bob will have some establishment there.

Made a few bucks

Still bummed and confused about what happened Monday. Could have really used the $1000 or at least $200 to get a new laptop and the much needed blood tests. I need to get back on track and retake my life. I don't want to struggle my entire life battling with alcoholism. It scares me a little bit. I go back and forth whether I could quit if needed. I believe I could, I simply don't want to. I imagine that's what all alcoholics think. I'm definitely a functioning alcoholic, but drinking every night can't be healthy to say the least. Wednesday was very busy at Winston's. Everyone did well and that was exciting. There was, going back to the open mic, 4 straight women that performed. Not against female comics at all, but I normally space them out as there just isn't a lot of them. The 3 female comics and one gay comic advanced. They just installed a new window that I think has been drawing in a few more random people. After that I went to Bar 11. I was a little drunk and had a hard time on stage. I got some laughs, but struggled and did the worst on the show. Thursday was the Comedy Store. I went up in a prime spot. The manager gave me a little extra time. I was going to mess around but I wanted to keep the show going esp. as I was doing 10 minutes. I'm getting somewhat tired of my jokes. I've been trying to write more, getting tired of my jokes. The weekend headliner popped in. I felt I held my own against him. Friday was Winston's. There was already people there when I arrived. It was a good crowd throughout the night. Some people struggled, but overall if the comic was funny, the crowd laughed. Made a few bucks, which is nice. Saturday was working at the Store. The headliners were old school. Have there sets they've been doing for 15 years and don't mix it up. Just long, hacky stories. The first crowd was the best I've seen in there since I started working there. A girl I used to date showed up with her new fiance. I'm fine with it, although I miss the sex. She was so intense, it was nuts. I had hoped to go up, but one of the headliners brought a friend who opened both shows. She was meh. She even did well the first show. They invited us to perform on their Belly Room shows any Monday we wanted. I have to make it up there at some point.

Really?

Sunday at the Store was a little rough. Went up somewhat early, but just couldn't get a good rhythm going. I tried talking to the crowd, or chat it up with some hot chicks to the left but they wanted nothing to do with it. Monday was the Madhouse finals. It was the first finals I went into thinking I was going to win. After my set, I assumed it was a for sure. Comics on the show and not told me they thought I had it. I closed with having beat box as I rapped. Not sure that hurt me. It would be extremely crazy to think that was hacky. The crowd was smaller than the other finals. So there was a lot of comics and their votes clearly made a difference. I was shocked and angry. I figured it was between me and another comic. When his name was said first I assumed I had it. When my name wasn't called I just left. I felt bad cause a few friends came down from L.A. to watch the show and I didn't say bye. She was somewhat upset, but I don't think she realized the toll it took on me. I still need to talk to the guys that tallied the votes to figure out what happened. Tonight was the Comedy Store. It was a bringer show so I wasn't sure how I'd do. It was meh to say the least. A few people said I did well, and someone jokingly said they didn't like me. It definitely wasn't great. The headliner from L.A. told us basically that we should move to L.A. or New York now because we're starting over. I'm thinking about it more and more. We'll see how I like it when I visit in a month.

Weekend fun

Winston's was a roller show. When I arrived at 630 there was already a decent amount of people in the crowd. I think a few open mic comics brought some people, and the features each brought a couple. Winston's also installed a new window so I wonder if that drew in a few randoms. The show was picking up a nice momentum even through the lightning round. Well Jesse was out of town and I had someone else read out the names. He forgot to read off one name, and since it was the dude's first time and he had a few friends I felt obligated to give him a spot. Well as expected he was pretty terrible and sucked the life out of the show. The dude that went up next did ok ripping on him but as far as jokes, the crowd somewhat was tapped out. My set started off pretty decent, but fell flat with the new jokes I tried. When I got the door money I was sure it was short. The door guy is pretty dumb, but I trust he wouldn't steal. There was one show where they missed out on a $100 bill. I felt this was the case. I spoke with him and he didn't know what I was thinking, and was defensive. I spoke to the bartender/ manager and she kind of blew me off and her douchey bf who was a former doorman tried to give me $5. I almost wanted to take it because he was such a douche. I told her I felt the door was 100$ short, to which she said she didn't think it was that busy. I stood my ground. About 25 minutes later the other doorman gave me $100 bill. I knew it. I smoothed things over with the manager and door guy, but still somewhat sketchy busy, esp. as Jesse wasn't there. Saturday was a pretty stress free show at the Store. Both shows weren't that busy, and the crowds weren't rowdy, esp. with the second show holding a bachelorete party with over 20 women. I got to open the second show when a comic who was supposed to open claimed to be too drunk to go up. It was a weird thing as I assumed I was going to open, then told I wasn't, then 4 minutes before the show I'm told I am going to open. I don't know whether it was just a mind game, who cares. My set started strong, fizzled a bit, then ended decent. One of the owners was there and he said he thought I was funny. Didn't feel good throughout, but I'd say it was good enough for opening. The comics on the show were meh. The feature did the best. His crowd work did well, but his jokes were ok. Had a lot of premises but his actually jokes didn't do that well. The headliner was very cute, but as far as being a headliner I don't see it. Her jokes hit ok, but there was no real build up. She hated on men for the most part, with some weird demands. She clearly dated a lot of comics and was either hurt or hated every moment of it.

Weird week

Sunday at the Store was decent. Went up early, was a slow night. The crowd was less supportive than the usual Sunday crowd. With football starting up I think the shows will be slower. Monday was the contest at the Madhouse. It was a pretty stacked line up so I wasn't sure whether or not I'd advance. I lucked out and went up 9th. My set was pretty decent. I should have done a cleaner set as the person that brought most of thecrowd does all clean and is a Christian. He advanced, and I will adjust for the finals. I got through and 3 comics who usually do well, 2 of which I find very funny, did not advance. I have to take some pride in that. Tuesday I worked at the Store. It was one of the most annoying shows I've worked at in awhile. The show was supposed to start at 8, but the booker convinced management to start at 830. The host was wasted, and we had to tell him to leave. Then there was a wave of horrible comics. All thinking they were better than the previous, and all bombing. There were a few single fat ladies that come to every Rick Martinez show. Not sure they think he's gonna bang them, or if he has. He's completely a promoter and such an awful comic, but crowds eat it up. It's sickening. Wednesday was Winston's then the Store. There were a few people at Winston's. Everyone did ok. I headed over to the Store after having a few drinks. Before my set I mentioned to a comic "friend" that I said on the podcast that he was funny on stage and not so much off stage. He flipped. Threatening to fight me. So unrealistic. Talking about how he takes the craft seriously, when he does it once a month. Some people have no clue. It was so akward. Having talked to him since, and really have no desire to. My set was ok, just messed around. It was a big crowd but by the time I got up, the crowd was pretty dead. It was a struggle to get laughs but I did ok. Thursday was back to the Store. It was the smallest crowd for a Thursday that I can remember. They weren't easy but they did laugh at good jokes, and awknowledgement of bad jokes. I felt fine about my set.

Roller coaster week

Had likely the most productive comedy week in my 3 plus years doing comedy. All while having my relationship with the gf come to an end. It's scary but I know it's for the best. We just arn't compatible. As far as comedy I kept up with doing different sets. It's crazy to think I did the most time, but at the same time made the 2nd least amount of money for the week. Comedy is a crazy game. Wednesday I did 6 minutes to a pretty dead Winston's open mic crowd. I got a few chuckles, nothing to great but I made Jesse laugh, and that's always a good sign. The contest was somewhat slow, but the crowd did laugh. There were 3 no shows. So we chose to advance all 5 people. Kinda funny that by far the funniest person on the show shouldn't have advanced. Thursday was the Store. It was rough. I went up 2nd and was doing minutes 46-53 of my sets. A couple things I said, which I still believe in didn't hit very well. I am going to stick with the jokes. I closed with the Depot joke, and had a girl say I was funny. I didn't do awful but it was by far my worst set in a bit at the Store. Friday was Winston's. Likely one of the worst Friday shows that I can remember. Had a dude that is funny, but expected him to promote somewhat. Also, one of the headliners I expected to promote he did not. Only one of the people attached to the show really brought anyone. I can handle a small crowd but they did not want to laugh at pretty much anything. Jesse and I did the whites vs. crackas bit. It hit moderately ok. I made it through 8 minutes to complete the hour for the week. I would say I have 45 minutes out of that I'd be comfortable doing. I have another 20 or so that I didn't even do. I think I could do a solid 45 minutes, problem is I don't know if I could remember that much material. My jokes are all one or 2 minutes. I don't have long bits like I see all the weekend headliners doing. I think the next task is stretching out my current material. Saturday was the Store. Pretty slow night. None of us got to open as it was an all gay line up and the L.A. Store didn't want to put us up. Pretty stupid if you ask me. The people on the show were nice. Headliner even invited us to the condo after. I would have gone if I didn't have to work at frigin 8 am. I really hate getting up early. Someone called one of the comics a faggot, and he was very angry. I'm not sure what happened but I know a punch was thrown. The comic was very angered. I just don't understand if you're comfortable in you skin, and except being gay, why would that would hurt you so much. One of the comics say it's like saying the n word, which I disagree. That word has history. While I wouldn't call a gay person the word, and wouldn't want to be around when someone did, but I think people should be happy with whoever they are. If you're that embarrassed you shouldn't talk about having a man eating ice cream out of your butt.

Great week so far

Sunday was my biggest night of comedy so far. I did 4 shows. Did the open mic at the Madhouse (3 min), smallish but good crowd. Did a rant about how much my gf(now ex gf)hates me that got a good response. Even got a weird sigh. Next I went up 3rd at ACC (10 min). It was kinda a weird set. The lights are so bright. And as I was doing my set I could hear a couple of black ladies talking in the front. I couldn't see them and assumed they were just ordering. Finally I looked over and they were just reading the menu really loud. I made a comment about them not at a Tyler Perry film. They laughed and the rest of the set went pretty well. The owner talked to me a little before I left about emailing him to host some shows. He was somewhat vague and I'm not sure whether or not I want to email him. I chatted with a dude that worked there, and he said it may or may not be a good opportunity if I don't care about money. After that I did a set at the Palace (10 min). It was a small crowd but one of the best Palace sets I'd ever had. I wanted to do crowd work but the comic after me asked if I was gonna do jokes or crowd work, so I assumed he wanted me to stick to jokes. I mixed him some crowd work but stuck to my jokes. Finally I closed out the show at the Store (10 min). I followed a black comic that always does a jokes about being good at hide and seek. I reversed it to say I was good in Alaska. They crowd surprisingly liked it. My set went well from there. My roomie who has been esp. dicky lately, said something to the effect it had to do with my intro. A girl yesterday said I did well, and the manager even let me run the light. It was a really fun set. Overall I did 33 minutes of different jokes and all but one or two hit pretty well. Last night I did the Store open mic (7 min). It was a small crowd but they were there to laugh. The same host gave me a condescending intro about being the funniest person there. I pretty much shit on it and the rest of the show. I did 7 different minutes, and all of that hit decently. So far I've done 40 different minutes this week. I have another 7 on Thursday and 8 at Winston's. For a total of 55 minutes. If I open one of the Store shows on Saturday I will have done over an hour this week. That's really cool to me. I will do a different 15 in the first two shows, but will reuse jokes if I open the Store show. Great week overall and it's only Tuesday.

Another productive comedy week

Sunday was the Store. My set was pretty decent. I kept stumbling over my words, but I got through it. Had a few comics compliment my set. Mike even said I made him laugh and thought I was a good hire. Monday I was in a comedy competition at the Madhouse. I drank a little bit during the day. I followed a guy that sang a song about shitting in his pants. I ripped on him a little bit and one of his equally terrible comedy friends yelled from the back, "Fuck you Jeff." I didn't know at the time who it was until my roommate told me later. I basically just did crowd work the whole time. I wasn't sure whether or not I'd advance, and to be honest I didn't really care. Tuesday was back at the Store, or so I thought. The show ended up getting cancelled after we were there for a half hour. I texted a few people and secured a spot at the Palace after their contest. I basically just voiced out some new jokes, and got some decent responses. I wasn't expecting much as the crowd was small but I got some decent laughs from the small crowd. Wednesday was hosting Winston's. I tried a few jokes in between, most of which got no response. I know better than to try jokes in between comics. The contest was decent. Thursday was back to working at the Store. I went up forth. I enjoyed my set. Messed around with some jokes. Friday was Winston's. Wasn't sure there would be many people there but ended up being a decent turn out. My set started off pretty good but I couldn't get a solid finish as hard as I tried to. Saturday I got to open the first Store show. I had a feeling I would open one of them. The crowd was almost sold out. My nerves have gone down about opening. I try not to think about it. I started off pretty slow, but picked up steam nicely. The headliner said he enjoyed my set. He asked me how long I'd been doing it and when I said 3 and half years he said he figured Id been doing it at least 5 years. Apparently he didn't watch my set according to my roommate. But he told me again when I left that he liked it. Whether or not he watched it, he has no reason to say that. He even said "I'm not trying to jerk you off." To which I laughed and said, I have no pull around here. Last time he ran the light by 50 minutes, last night he only ran it by 20. Not too shabby.

Working on new sets

So I planned this week to do a different set every night I performed. I pretty much stuck to that goal other than doing 2 jokes twice. One was a new joke I only did this week, and the other fit in with my set. Sunday was the Store. My set was pretty decent, don't really remember exactly how it went, but I know it wasn't a disaster. I know the new joke didn't do very well. I wrote myself into the line up as the list maker forgot to put me on. They were doing a raffle and it was a charity show. I went up kinda later than usual for a Sunday. I started off ok, trailed off a bit, but ended strong enough. Tuesday was back at the Store. It was a showcase show for the people that took the comedy workshop. There is a kid that has now taken the class at least 3 times. I find that so crazy. His dad is obviously loaded and just wants to get his kid out the house or a few hours, but it's so nuts to take the class 3 times, esp. from a woman that has never done comedy. He still holds the mic really low, and you can barely hear him. I want to help him out, but he seems to be a spoiled punk who thinks he's the shit. He actually already has a tee shirt with his website on it. I got to do 5 minutes at end and it went pretty well. Wednesday was the contest. It was kinda weird as the open mic was busier than the actual contest. The dude that took second in the contest before, due to bringing a shit ton of people bailed on his spot. I was bummed as I would have headed up to the Store after had I known Jesse was going to do a podcast. Otherwise I grabbed a beer at a spot while Hugo ate and headed back to Lindsey's and did the standard of getting wasted. I also woke up at 4, couldn't fall asleep, and drank again. My drinking is likely the worst it's ever been, I think. I know at one point I was drinking a bottle a day, pissing myself, but this just seems to be ridiculous. I did take 2 days off, but I need to get it under control fast. Thursday was back at the Store. I went up third. It was the very few times where I would say I had a good set. The first guy bombed, second dude did meh, but I really felt I opened the crowd up. The guy before me got off early so the piano player wasn't back at his spot yet, so I said "give it up for Lou, getting high in the alley." I think the crowd enjoyed that and loosened up a bit. I did mostly tv references which most hit. Friday was Winston's. It was slow as expected, but I felt it was a little busier than the door brought in, like Wednesday now that I think of it. It's weird to accuse the door guys of stealing, but I think it's more they let more people in for free than they should. We were about 25 minutes over time when I arrived. I played catch up and luckily a few people didn't show, so I was able to get the show back on schedule and we even ended right at 9. My set was decent. I tried a few new/ old jokes that went decent. I made a knock on a few of the jokes that didn't do as well as the others that got a better response from the audience. A comic asked me if I was really that miserable on stage, to which I replied no. It's just a trick to keep the audience on my side. Saturday was the Store. The headliner was Carl Labove. I had never seen him, but I had heard of him. Many claim that he is there favorite. And although he isn't exactly my style of comedy, he one of the few old school comics that keeps his set fresh. He did almost a totally different set from the first show to the second. I was told all 4 set from the weekend were different. He was interactive with the crowd, but not mean or overdoing it. He has a great comedic mind.

Kinda in a rut

No real stories to discuss. Been back performing. Last Tuesday I was in the Comedy Palace's comedy competition. I had fun with it. Worked on the new cracka's vs white people bit. The crowd didn't really know how to respond but I think it did fine. Wasn't sure I was going to advance but I really didn't care. When the first name was announced I was pretty sure I wasn't going to advance. Turns out I was the last name called, so that was cool. Wednesday was Winston's. Show was fine. There was a decent amount of people there. Thursday was the Store. I was working so I never know how that's going to go. I went up late and got a decent response. Friday was Winston's. There was a decent crowd. I worked with Jesse on more cracka vs white people material. Saturday I opened the first show. I did ok. Worse than the last couple times but likely better than the first time. I wasn't nervous, just think the crowd was really on board. Sunday was back at the Store. I followed Westland who likely had the best set I've seen a best of person do since I started comedy. He free style rapped something on dolphins, it was amazing. It was the first time in my comedy career I was nervous having to follow someone. I grabbed a friend's hoddie and did my best. I opened with trick daddy and rode the momentum from there. It was a pretty solid set. Monday I took a day off from comedy and basically drank all day. We went to the shelter intending to get one kitten, but ended up with two. Of course the one I like is sick. I have bad luck with animals. I'm hesitant to get close to these ones. It was rough at first because the old cat didn't adjust well to the new kittens. I hear he's taken a liking to them meow. Tuesday I worked at the Store. I got to go up. My set was weird. I think I was still a little hung over and somewhat out of it. Also the host brought me up saying I killed three black men. That was so weird and outlandish it really threw me off. It took me a few minutes to get out of that funk. I had trouble remembering my jokes, even tried an old joke, and it was horrid. I got the light, then they shut the light off. I struggled through the 15 minutes and did fine. Two people approached me after. One said even though I made light on how weird the set was, he said he enjoyed it and thought I looked like I was having fun. Another girl told me the reason many people weren't laughing is there was too many race jokes. I first said I don't do any race jokes, and the reason that was is there were a lot of black comedians on the show and that is a major thing they joke about. Wednesday was Winston's. It was a weird show. The only one that promoted was a 70 year old woman. Her fans were not pleased to be there and their lack of laughter made that apparent. She ended up advancing, then told me she won't be around for the next round. Made no sense to enter, but whatever. My room mate didn't advance and was pretty bummed. I don't care why people care about advancing in contests. All that matters is the finals. The other stuff doesn't matter. After that I went to Quality Social. I took it as a good time. I was asked to do 20 minutes which is kinda a long time in a bar environment. I was a little drunk and just had fun with it. I made light of how long it was going. Had a dude talk to me and buy me a drink after. That's always a nice feeling even if it just is from a dude. Thursday was the Store. I had to follow Erik again. He did well, but not quite as well. I plowed through my set. It was decent, nothing special. Friday was Winston's. It was pretty dead. The two features I expected to promote brought no one. I had fun with my set. Did some whacky sex jokes, and got a decent response. Saturday was working at the Store. The headliner had a rough time during the first show. I heard she kinda bombed the two shows on Friday too. The last show she did well. She does a lot of impressions, but it doesn't really translate into comedy. It's not particularly funny, but she is very talented. She's also sweet, and you want to root for her. I was surprised how cut throat the audience treated her.

Trouble on the home front

No real stories to report. I thought of a joke called white people vs crackas which I thought was a funny concept but had no idea whether it would work on stage. It hit pretty hard at Winston's, but that is a mostly comics crowd so who knows if it would work at the Store. I took a trip to San Luis Opisbo. That was a nice area. Did a lot of drinking, but didn't really get drunk. Did some wine tasting, ate some oysters, which gave me some of the worst spelling farts I've ever had. Haven't been around the Store over the past week or so. Was supposed to do the ACC last night. But was physically ill. Ex-gf told me 30 minutes before the show that she was kissed by another guy the night before. Granted they were drunk, and he supposedily kissed her, but I am not sure what to do. Things have been pretty bad the past few months, and I've been contemplating leaving before this happened regardless. She seems to think we can make it work, but I doubt that will come true. This brings me back to what happened with the ex. Things were never the same. The trust is gone, and I will never look at her the same way again. I was looking forward to doing the ACC show for awhile as it had my good comedy friends on. I vommited in the toilet and knew that I couldn't go up. Worst part is I left and walked around for 45 minutes to try to find my car. Only to find out it was a block up from the club. I even drove down the wrong way on a one way street. My brain was blank. I want to get back on stage immediately, but I don't know if I can.

Back on the grind

Sunday I worked and it was pretty slow. When I went up the crowd was tired. I followed a L.A. dude that was the feature at the Madhouse all weekend, and talked about the Colorado shooting to open up for 3 minutes. The crowd pretty much checked out after that. My set was not great, and the crowd started filing out after that. Monday was the open mic. There was a decent crowd. When I went up I chatted with a group of girls in the front. I had a feeling it was a birthday party, as there was 4 hot chicks and one blah chick. I assumed it was her b day, and I was right. As I started chatting with them, I find out the bday girl has wanted to do comedy, and her friends she's hilarious. I, of course, sit down with them and try to get her on stage, with no success. The set was kinda weird, and I think I somewhat put a damper on the show. Some of the comics tried to do the crowd work I did, but didn't get the same reaction. Tuesday was the Store show. It was a small crowd, but they were there to laugh. I went up somewhat in the middle, only doing 6 minutes. I did well, got to do some different jokes, and everything pretty much got a good reaction. Wednesday was Winston's. There was a pretty good crowd. Thursday was the Store. I drank pretty much all day, and was slightly buzzed. I could tell I was out of it, as I was shaking the mic, and didn't have great stage presence. It was by far the drunkest I'd been performing at the Store. I think I did fine, but who knows. I did open the show, with some jokes and some chatting with the crowd. I know I took some popcorn for the group sitting in the front row. I smoked after and that made the gf very upset. Friday was Winston's. The crowd slowly trickled in. It wasn't packed but the crowd was supportive. My set went pretty well. The gf said I had the best set of the night. Who knows if that's correct as she was drinking. I was happy with it, and got some jokes out that don't always work. Saturday I opened the second show at the Store. I assumed after last week I was going to open a lot more shows. I didn't feel like I did amazing but according to other people on the show they enjoyed my set. The headliner jokingly said she was going to steal my home depot joke and do it on the road. The feature and the opener also said on a few occasions that they enjoyed my set. That's a cool feeling.

Slow week in comedy and some vegas action

After work on Sunday I headed with my buddy, his gf, and mine. We got in pretty late, around midnight or so. We got bumped up to a suite because all the smoking rooms were taken. Not bad for getting a free room regardless. Gf got a little drunk and was being a little bratty. I wasn't too pleased about it, and showed my anger. She took off at one point and I had to search for her up and down the strip. Pretty shitty start. Next day I woke up and started drinking. I pretty much drank for 13 hours straight. I was slightly annoying but never got too out of control. Ended up losing around $500 playing blackjack and food. 1/4 of that was money I gave to the gf to gamble. Pretty lame, when she lost that money, she took out more, and didn't give me any. We came back Tuesday night and I worked at the Store. It was a pretty busy show. We were staffed for maybe 50 or 60, but there ended up being almost 200 people. The servers were swamped and we had to turn people away because they just couldn't serve people anymore. One of the servers said she once served the entire room by herself. That's nuts. Wednesday was the contest. It turned out pretty busy. Crowd was not easy. One of the comics pretty much tore into them, and I had to say something about him on stage to keep the crowd happy. He didn't like that I did that and confronted me. We talked it out and he realized he was in the wrong. Thursday was my promoted show at the Comedy Store. I had been trying to do a different 15 minutes every two months, but I was not able to do make it 15. I made it close to 12 I believe, but lost the crowd with a joke and couldn't gain momentum with the jokes I was trying. I started off pretty strong, but tried my robert meowney joke and the crowd kinda tuned out. They were the hardest Thursday crowd to crack. Plus a lot of them were talking and no one told them to be quiet. I know the security dude told us that he was not going to shush people to see how we'd handle it, but it was annoying because I was doing a longer set, and was taping it. I think it went ok, just not as strong as the last few shows we've done. Friday was Winston's and dual headlining with Jesse. It was pretty dead. The girl I booked to promote didn't bring many people. My buddies and their gf's came, but no one else I knew came. A lot of the comics stayed and actually moved up to the front to watch and laughed. I think we need to practice it a little more, but in front of a real crowd it could be something popular. Saturday was back to work at the Store. I tried to give up the shift to no avail. First show was sold out. I actually got to open, and then had to host the whole show. I messed up the first girl's name, to which she told me again how to pronounce it. I asked what I had said and she had no idea. I think I somehow got it right when I brought her up, but just said her first name on the outro. I am not too concerned. My opening set was pretty strong, almost every joke got a somewhat applause break. I'll likely get more opening spots from now on. The headliner said I had a good set, although he was just being nice as he needed a favor.

Lotta drinking and some drama

Wednesday was Winston's. I started drinking kinda early that day. I did the contest but had to bail early as I had another show. The contest was pretty dead. Only 6 of the 8 contestants showed. The two people that were eliminated were the 2 people I planned on bringing people, which they didn't. My friend was in town and checked some of the open mic. They weren't too impressed. I can't blame them, there was no one there. After that I got a ride to American Comedy Club. Although I've checked the show out a few times this was the first time I was on the show. I saw a dude I used to get along with that most of the San Diego comedy scene can't stand. I always defended him as he normally paid me to do his shows. Anyways, couple months back he had some stupid facebook post to which I made an assanine response. He took it the wrong way, deleted me from facebook, and made himself look like such a tool. Anyways, when I saw him on the show, he said hello, and we shook hands. Well he does his set, bombs as usual, and I was after him. I made light of it, and he yelled something about wanted to kick my ass from the audience. After that I tore into him a little more, than proceeded to do my set. I stay for a bit, and listen to the headliner, that requested levi be on the show, talked shit about me on stage. About how I should never insult another professional, and said something to the affect that I'm an amateur. I was going to leave. When all of sudden Levi chases me down again, up the stairs. Telling me how I need to stop disrespecting him. This is when the owner runs over and tells Levi basically to leave the bar and that he wanted me to stay. He gave me his card and all. Once the headliner gets off stage he gives me a lecture how I shouldn't have done that. Such a tool. My friend, who gave me the ride, is talking about how he should have choked him. Pretty funny. I had some comics say they enjoyed it, so whatever. Next day I wake up to see a message from the guy, telling me to stop disrespecting him. To which I simply say you take things too seriously. He then went off on me for 5 straight messages, about how I suck and am an amateur. Funniest part was he called me ugly and poor. Hilarious. Friday was Winston's. The open mic started pretty slow. After that we had another roast. This one was harder to write for. I wasn't as close to them. I think it was another success. Everyone had fun and the audience enjoyed the show.

Store and friend time

Wednesday was the 4th. No show at Winston's. I hung out over there and voiced out some jokes. But, it ended with Jesse and I doing a bunch of Bob Hansen jokes. It was fun. Thursday I opened the show at the Store. It started off pretty slow and awkward. I guess I said something to the affect of, "My girlfriend knew I went without a boyfriend for a long time." I dug myself out of it and ended somewhat strong. Friday was Winston's. It was pretty slow and dead. Somehow the door brought in more money than expected. I knew I was sleeping there, so I drank a little more than I usually do. I was not drunk, but after my set I got pretty intoxicated. Saturday I worked the Store show. The headliner and feature were not the typical variety that they normally book for the weekends. I think they both did fine but they were very alty. They made e laugh at times, but they didn't do as well as many of the normal headliners. Sunday I worked at the Store and went up after the open mic winner. I always getting that spot for some reason. Not sure if it's a good or bad thing. I would say it's a worse spot than 3rd and 4th where people are performing on who were hired after me. I am fine with my set time, and usually do well. But it's a little silly for me to be getting shittier spots than people with less talent. I believe it has t do with me not kissing ass and playing the game. Monday was the Store open mic. I opened with some crowd work and tried out a bunch of new jokes or stuff that I tried on Sunday. I was very happy with it. One joke tanked pretty hard, but overall it was good. I ran the light by about 2 minutes, which is the first time I've ran the light by that much in awhile. I didn't care too much as I was the senior guy working and wanted to end strong.

Chatting and such

Sunday I was at the Comedy Palace. I was booked as the headliner, which doesn't mean much. I just went up last and did the most time. The crowd was kind of weird, typical palace crowd. Watched some of the comics do well, some did meh. I asked for half the comics to be on the show, so that was fun. I went up with no real plan. My first joke went pretty ok, then I screwed up my second job. After that I chatted with a couple of people in the front row. I felt it went pretty well. Almost every line I said got a decent response from the audience. I slipped in a few jokes as well. It was cool to do that much crowd work, totally sober. I had a good time. I took shots at the people for most of my set. I went up to them and made sure we were cool. They said they enjoyed it, and wanted me to tell the others they enjoyed the mas well. Monday was the Store open mic. Like I've said, it's become one of my favorite nights. I tried a few new jokes, and slipped in some crowd work. I was happy with it. Had a guy approach me after about doing a show in Orange County. I had to decline as it's a Friday, and he could only pay me $10. I told him if he had something else open let me now. He said he was working on getting an L.A. show, and I said I'd be down for that. Also had an audience member give me a joke idea, but started the sentence with, "you were alright, but you should say..." Tuesday was the Store. I wasn't sure I was going to do a set, but ended up doing 6. Was suppose to do 7, but the host ran the light to open, then did another 3 minutes between the first comic. That led to the manager saying that the rest of us had to cut our sets short a minute. I basically just had fun with the fact we were playing music, than played with the crowd woooing. And before I even got into my first joke, I already got the light. I was satisfied with my set. The booker said he enjoyed it, and wished I had more time. The headliner was great, and light years ahead of me.

Back at it

Took a few days off from the blog. No real excuses, just nothing really happened with the comedy front. Can't remember all the shows but I'll attempt to remember what happened. I know last Monday I was in the opening round of the madhouse comedy comp. I was eliminated. Kinda funny I've either made it to the finals or got knocked out in the first round in the 4 comps I've been in. I basically just talked to the crowd about one comic. I got a decent response, but they were kinda a young, dumb crowd. I also forgot to raise my hand when they were announcing the names at the end. I could have just done my set and likely advanced, who knows. Either way I could care less. I wasn't effected, obviously I'd like to advance but don't care either way. Tuesday was Sandi Shore's showcase at the Store. There was only 3 students, 2 were really young 13 and 14 I think, and the other was an older gay dude. One of the kids was taking the class for the 2nd time. Not sure what the point of this is. Clearly his dad has money to blow, but he should just be doing more open mics around town. His dad likely never made it in comedy, and now is trying to start his son on the right track. I can understand taking the class once to get over the stage freight and understand the basics of comedy, but after that just move on and start performing. Wednesday was Winston's. It was actually pretty busy. It's been so hit or miss lately. The line up was pretty decent. I think a couple of them will make it to the finals. After the show I drove up to the Store. Not really wanting to and almost bailed. I had a decent set, mostly chatted with the crowd. It's a no pressure situation going up late. Plus I had a few drinks, and the crowd was much more supportive than Thursday shows. I just would rather hang out at Winston's, then drive up there to be judged by strangers. Thursday I opened the show at the Store. My set was meh. I don't know why the Thursday shows are so damn hard. I think people have higher expectations for Thursdays over Sunday and Wednesday for some reason. That and going first is never easy. I think Sundays are easier to go up early as people likely came from dinner or had a drink or two before the show. Friday was Winston's. very good, fun show. Perfect amount of people in the crowd, and they were quite supportive. not an easy crowd but they did laugh and were respectful. It was the final show for Bob, the dude that used to run the show. I think he's a good dude, but New York may eat him up if he doesn't change the way he talks to people. Saturday was the Store. It was an old timey comic. He used a gay voice, a black man's voice, even brought his dog on stage. It was pretty terrible. Some people even walked out. Others complained how bad it was. I read a napkin on a table that read, "Should we leave? Yes X2." Pretty humorous. But just goes to show how important time in comedy is. There's plenty of comics in San Diego that could do much better than that, but they haven't been doing it long enough. You gotta just keep plugging away. Sunday was my birthday. Had some comic friends over. We drank some beers, smoked some pot, and ate some pizza. It was a really good time. I wasn't sure how it was going to be, but it was a really great time had by all. Monday was the Store open mic. Very fun show. This has become my favorite Comedy Store show. Has a Winston's, no pressure feel to it. I basically talked to one of the girls who was there for her birthday. I didn't get any jokes in really, but had a good time on stage and had some people tell me after they had fun. Tuesday was the Store. I worked the money booth for the first time. It was a bringer show, and 54 people paid 10$ each to watch bottom of the barrel comics. It is all that is wrong with comedy. Kinda funny I handed the guy $540. He never checked the numbers or counted heads, I easily could have taken money out and he'd never know. It's not worth it for me, but he's kinda too trusting with a stranger holding his money. Also funny he was angered he had to pay comics that brought more than 10 people. Really? Isn't it the goal to have comics bring people? That's the point of the damn bringer show. Wednesday was Winston's. It was pretty slow. I was suppose to go to the store after but decided to pass and just hang out and have some drinks with Jesse. That was a lot more fun. It was slow so we played the theme show game which is always a good time. The show was a lot of fun, and I was telling Jesse if we had a following we truly could make the show a big deal. Thursday was back to the Store. I requested an early spot, which was veto'd. And he purposely put me up as late as he could. My set was fine. Followed a very hacky L.A. pop in who talked about sex for 13 minutes. It was heartbreaking to hear all the laughs and my roommate's sister say he was her favorite comic. I don't know if I need to just give up and do that awful comedy. My set was ok. Better than the last few Thursdays. I heard people talking to my left talking the whole time. I just plowed through it, because I was still getting a decent array of laughs. I talked to the door guy about it and he said I should have handled it. I said I'd rather just go through jokes even though I likely should have. Friday was Winston's, and much weirder than usual. It was a show I wasn't looking forward to at all. Although there were funny people on the show, I could care less about that. It takes away from the fun of the show. I felt I was paying out too much for a show that I don't enjoy producing. One of the comics had to go up early, another showed up late, and the main person complained that the "real" show was starting late. I even had a person approach me and asked, "When do the real comics go on?" Sweet. They were not planning to laugh at anyone who wasn't the headliner. They were older people, and not really fans of comedy. I didn't do a set, made a few bucks, and went home. Saturday was the Store with Jeff Garlin. Last time I saw him I wasn't really that impressed. He basically just did crowd work the entire time. This time he did jokes for the first show, and I thought a few of them were really good. The second show he involved the crowd a lot more. Some stuff was funny, others not so much. I could tell he wanted more reaction from the crowd, and acknowledged that some stuff wasn't working. I felt he tried to hard to work stuff out. People are there to hear him speak words. I realize he may have been able to perform without an act before he became such a big name, but now people want to just be around him. Hear what he had plan to say. Either way I got inspired to do more involve the crowd more during my sets. I am good talking with people, and there's no reason to not use that skill.

Tough week

Well Tuesday night into Wednesday was pretty much the hardest day I can recall. We had to put one of our cats down. I have a wide array of emotions. First off anger. The cat always had problems but she managed to snap out of it after a day or two. We thought we finally figured it out. We stopped giving her wet food, and she seemed to be doing fine. My gf decided to give her wet food, to which I gave her more later in the night. She ate a lot. She was not looking good the next day, so the gf made an appt. with a specialist. I disagreed, I wanted to keep up with just leaving her off dry food. Anyways, she's the expert. So, we take her in, and drop her off fine. Gf picks her up and the cat is awful. When we dropped her off the receptionist asked if she was a cat. Strike 2 for wanting to leave. Anyways, we didn't hear from the vet for 10 hours. When she was picked up she was covered in urine and had seizures. That never happened to her. I was at work, so I was not able to see her at that time. When I got home in the a.m she was in bad shape. Twitching and struggling to breath. I just laid with her, and it was really difficult. After a few hours, we took her back into another vet. They gave her more drugs, but nothing seemed to help, it was too late. We ended up taking her back to the original vet and they put her down. It was the most I've cried, and felt crushed in a long, long time. I'm still suppressing my feelings, but I must go on. I saw a lot of myself in her, and it was very troubling to lose her. Wednesday, I bailed on Winston's. I also had a spot at the Store, but of course passed on that as well. I told my roommate who was working there I wasn't going. And because he's such a lazy moron, he never told anyone. Thursday was a day of drinking. We went to OB, had some appetizers and drinks. We then went to the Store. I had an early spot. When I got there, the door guy asked why I no called, no showed the night before. I said my roommate is an idiot. I told him about the cat, and he laughed. Pretty pathetic. I also told the other "manager" I apologized I didn't make it. He said I should have called earlier, so he could make adjustments to the schedule. Really? You can't give a couple people more time you goofball. He's just such a 2 faced douche. Anyways, my set went decent. We then went to a few bars, and grabbed some sushi. It was a good day of healing. Friday I went to Winston's. It was somewhat busy. But the crowd got there early, and started to get chatty towards the end. I think my set was somewhat ok. I brought back a joke I had scrapped because it didn't go well once or twice. Well it was likely the best joke I did that night. I also tried a new joke that got an ok response. After the show, a bunch of the comics hung out a South Beach. After that Billy and I went out in PB. It was a fun time. Got recognized at one of the bars. Always a cool thing. We bar hopped at a few places. Had a beer, people watched, talked about jokes, and headed back home. Saturday was the Store and Pauly Shore. Wow, wow, wow, if there's ever a day to make me question whether I should be doing comedy, this would be it. His dad went up before him. I was surprised how many people actually knew who he was. He got a somewhat standing ovation after the first show. He did have some ok jokes about being old, and how pathetic Pauly was. The second show he got very preachy and it was getting awkward. The crowd was staying quiet, but for a weekend comedy show it was far from funny. Pauly was almost sad to watch. He had a bunch of hacky political jokes and how people still approach him, nearly 20 years after he's peaked. He ended with 3 shows, a rap, a country song, and a party song. The crowd ate it up but it was very deflating. I also asked to forgo my shift beer to get a rockstar. To which it was made a big deal and they settled on giving me a small rockstar. Gee thanks. It's so pathetic how much the club and waitresses are making, and how little they care for comics. It is called "The Comedy Store," not the "Waitress Store." Granted they do work hard, but honestly making 4 to 5 times as much as us i just silly. Plus the waitresses are constantly taking shots, and they limit us to one beer. Even if I go on an off night I pay the same price as any other comic. It's pathetic with comedy that once you have/ are making money, people give you everything you want for free. But, while were struggling, we're treated like worthless scum. Last night was definitely a night that made me dread working there.

Minding the Store

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Winston's, Store, Podcasts

Wednesday was Winston's. It was slightly slower than usual, and 2 of the comics were late, and one didn't show up until the show was over. Thursday was the Comedy Store. I went up kinda late after an LA pop in basically took a shit on stage for 12 minutes. I had somewhat of an awkward start, called someone out for being a bad tipper, to which he got completely embarrassed. I then had to struggle with some hecklers, but I think I made it out ok. One of my gf's friends said they saw me and said I killed it. Who knows if he was just being nice, but he didn't have to say anything. Friday during the day I did a podcast with my gf. We went into the hardships of our relationship and being an artist and managing a relationship. I said some nice, honest things and she pretty much complained about me. I was asked what my 5 year plan was, to which I don't really have one. I don't think in this field it's smart to make hard goals. Comedy takes time, and I'm content where I'm at. We got into my alcoholism. It was pretty uncomfortable. But it obviously needs to be addressed. I don't know if it's mind over matter, but my liver has been feeling swollen and uncomfortable. I should get checked out, but I just don't want to hear the verdict. I'm going to really make a conscious effort to only drink 2 days a week. Friday night was Winston's. We started really late. I guess I need to be there right at 6, in order to make sure the show actually starts. Sometimes those guys are too lax. Someone joked about me not having a problem being too nice. It's tough when we have time restraints. I chose to not do a set. It was half being a pussy and half because we were over time. Saturday I worked the show at the Store. The headliner was Chris Porter. It's pretty neat because I watched him on last comic standing when I had aspirations of being a comic and now I'm closing out the show and shaking his hand. Things are coming full circle. He was pretty funny, and had an original take on a lot of subjects. He came kinda angry, but I liked it. The feature was there a few weeks back and is also witty. The opener was awkwardly not good. It was uncomfortable to watch. I just don't get how she has been passed at the LA Store. She just talked a bout being a skank. But she looks so young, it made everyone uneasy.

New spots

Sunday I did the Comedy Palace. I assumed I was going to get more time than I get at the Store. I was hoping 15 to 20, it ended up being only 10. Oh well. The crowd actually seemed pretty supportive. Which was surprising because the Palace normally blows. Plus the comics on the show weren't used to doing promoted, non open mic shows. They were very risky and edgy. Not that I work clean but I don't take the easy way out. I told one of the comics who didn't get a response by saying, "I don't think Mexicans are real." He didn't know why it didn't get a response and also didn't think it was racist. I tried to let him know that he has to have a separate set of jokes for promoted shows and open mics. Open mics are made for more edgy, shocking material. Don't get me wrong, most crowds are stupid and like sex jokes. But, the key is to know where to draw the line. I ripped on the comics when I opened saying there was a lot of women hating material, and did my joke about hating hand jobs. One of the comics mentioned I did this joke. I came back with, this isn't a women hating joke. No one likes hand jobs. It's boring. The guy I followed ended basically by saying a Mexican with a mustache was gay, and then went into asking if he was a landscaper. To which the guy retorted, "Are you a faggot?" Nice to have to go up after that. My set was pretty solid. I was happy with it. Not everything hit, but I can't complain overall. Monday I tried to get a spot at Lestat's but my name was drawn pretty close to last. Tuesday I worked at the Store. It was a bringer show, so I didn't get to go up. The show started a half hour late because there was no one there at 8. They almost cancelled the show. They would have if there wasn't 10 people by 8. There was 8, but 2 showed up right at 8. There ended up being a decent crowd, 40 or so. The host opened by doing 20 plus minutes. Made some lame excuse saying, "I've been waiting for the light." To which I ran and turned it on. The security head told me I shouldn't have done that because there's no sense giving him that satisfaction when he never asked for a light. It makes sense. There is a headliner that is all there shows and is just god awful. He does have smarter material than one of the comics that yelled about teeth and ran the light by 4 minutes. Overall though he is the worst, and the fact he's the headliner is just pathetic.

Winston's and whatnot

Wednesday was Winston's. It was pretty busy which was nice. It was a mixture of free tickets and comics bringing people. They were a good crowd overall too. We were running over, so I didn't do a set. Everyone did pretty well, except the last dude. We were having a drink after and I pretty much told him he was approaching comedy the wrong way. He insults the crowd, and basically talks down to them. Doubt he'll make any adjustments, because he approaches comedy like he's too cool for it all." Thursday I opened the show at the Comedy Store. It was a struggle. I started off ok, then took a little bit of a dive. I said a few jokes that got no laughs at all. I can't remember telling a joke with that many people and getting zero reaction. I got slightly flustered and even began sweating. I pulled myself out of it, and ended somewhat ok. I immediately left and headed over to the American Comedy Company. I had the possibility to get up. Ended up I was about 5 minutes late, and missed my spot. Oh well. Still haven't gone up there yet, but I'm not too concerned. Friday was Winston's. Pretty decent crowd turn out. The show was going well, a few people had a rough time. I had somewhat a feeling I took it too far with the weird intro's, and may have screwed someone over. After that I moved into a more serious intro role. I think it was a fun show. My set was a roller coaster. Started off slow, had a nice middle, and couldn't get a strong ending. I was happy with it for the most part. Still working the struggle. Saturday I worked the Store show. It was a different show, as it was called the Rock N Roll show. The host looked like he was 14, and was very timid. He seemed nice enough, but is definitely not a host. He did have some decent jokes, but his delivery was very dry. Next up was a dude I started with. He lives in L.A. now. I spoke to him, and he seems grounded. He did pretty well. I think he is somewhat finding his voice on stage again. The next guy was the show booker. He was pretty brash, but the crowd seemed to like him. The headliner was pretty strong. He had a very easy going delivery and just seemed like he was talking. The first show I had a feeling he was going to get a standing ovation. His closing bit has a huge build up. A few people did stand, but I felt the aura of the room was a big standing ovation. I really felt like he was on cocaine. I told my roommate I thought this, and after the show he concurred. I told the security guy I felt the same, and he said yes for sure. I am currently listening to a podcast where he says he never did drugs. The podcast was done awhile ago, but who knows. The second show he ran the light by 40 minutes. He did 85 frigin minutes. So crazy to where you want to run the light by that much. It makes me question if I really want/ am destined to be a comedian. Even when I'm doing 8 minutes, I feel like I'm always looking for the light. I mentioned before the only time I can remember wanting to do more was the finals of the contest. Sometimes at Winston's I want to do more just to end strong, but that is different.