Having fun on stage

Been enjoying my time on stage lately. Basically been messing around, trying new jokes. Some of them work, others not so much. My style has been changing, and the jokes I write I enjoy, but crowds don't seem to enjoy them as much. I'm not sure if that's really what's going on or that's just my perception. Talked to one of my comedy friends who's moved to L.A. He told me he recently got a college agent. Good for him, he's a funny dude, so I'm happy for him. Been in a really weird mood lately. The ex has been randomly texting with me. I imagine she's just fucking with me, as she has no interest in getting back together. This breakup has been so hard on me. It's really taken a toll on me. With her I at least had something to look forward to. Now it's just misery. This comedy thing likely will never pan out. But I don't know what else I could possibly do with my life. It's really scary. Maybe I should just move home and give up the dream. Who knows.