It's been awhile

So depression is in full force. Never been through a losing streak so long. Been playing pretty well, but the unluckiness is making me ill. I can't trust the sites and even live is torture. Went to Vegas, it was miserable. Saw the gal I dated for a little bit. She is a full blown alcoholic, smokes, loves her dogs, and isn't affectionate at all. I have no idea why I like her. She is one of the few girls I've had a connection with since the gf. She has let herself get rather big and I really not physically or mentally attracted to her but I like her for some reason. She took off one night which led me to stay up and play poker for 24 hours straight. I almost made all my money back and found a way to give it all back. I need to quit as depression is setting in hardcore. I keep saying I'm gonna quit drinking for this or that and it never happens. I'm in such a rutt, it's pathetic.

Anyways comedy has been good. Took a week off when I went to Vegas. It was weird getting back into it. Had a show in a small town south of L.A. It was a small crowd but they laughed at just about everything. It was a table of family members and a few other scattered people. Funny thing is it was mostly a few SD comic buds booked by an L.A. comic. He's a good dude. When we get there he says order whatever food or drink you want. After about one round the waitress says "You guys have maxed out your tab." The booker is like what, this never happens... Ok it's cool. He says order whatever he'll pick up the tab. I stop drinking, but the others continue to order. It ends up being $60 or so, which they pay back the $30 he paid us. I didn't throw in as I drove and it was close to $30 in gas money. My set went pretty ok. Been trying some new jokes, most went ok. It was a fun show, but wouldn't say I'd do it again.

Before I went up I had a phone call with one of my former "friends" in comedy. I've talked about how he guilted me off his show. I talked to him about it. He's such a robot, he just kept saying things to squash all the beef. I don't even care about getting on shows, just want to be asked. He's all business and could careless about a friendship and thinking about others. Sucks I won't be able to do the show while my parents are here, but that's their choice.

Wednesday I was suppose to do a small bar show, but I never heard back from the booker, and wanted to play poker. Bad idea, just ran like shit. The bad luck is so depressing. Anyways, last night I was at the Comedy Store. I should have tried harder to promote. There ended up being 80 or so people. I had 3 for me. Pretty sad how I can bring so few people. I'm usually funny everytime, and often do different jokes, but people just don't want to see me. I followed a newer dude we put on the show to help promote. He bombed pretty hard. I had a set in mind, but knew I had to start off strong. I did my rap joke, which killed. I then tried some smarter jokes that got some awwww's but no true laughs. I closed with the bit with my roommate. It went really well.

Tonight was Winston's. It was a small crowd but they were listening and laughing. I tried some newer jokes which mostly hit. Some of the awww jokes from last night got solid laughs. I really had fun at the show tonight, and found myself laughing more than usual. A lot of us hung out after the show. I enjoy the comradery that comes with OBC. There is one dude that is a pain in the butt that I can't wait til he leaves. Every week there's something new he wants. Tonight he whined to go up later. Other weeks he's whinned to go up earlier. Can't wait til he leaves, it will make the show even better