It's 6:45 why am I awake?

So like I've talked about I've cut down on drinking, mostly just elimatinated my nightly intake of vodka. One of the main reasons I drink is I can't sleep otherwise. I wake up every 30 minutes and wake up very early. My mind is very active and always thinking. I also have a lot of dreams. Many times I dream about my ex. Yes I realize it's been 4 years and she's married to another dude, they may even have a kid I hear. So messed up that I can't move on. Even gals I've dated in S.D. only one or two I hung out with I didn't get drunk every meeting we had. I don't know why it's so hard to find someone I like. I don't persue women, or dress nice, but you'd figure I'd get lucky and meet someone by now. It's tough to meet women as all I do is comedy, most of my friends are comedians, and most of them are single, whatever.

Comedy was busy this week. Did a show Monday at the Lestat's open mic. It's a weird show as it's mostly music and the crowd isn't really pro comedy. First off all the musicians get 10 minutes, and comics only get 5. It's also a clean show. And although I wouldn't consider myself a clean comic, I do drop some swear words and discuss adult relations on occasion. I struggled through the set, got heckled by a 13 year old, and worked out some new jokes. It wasn't good by any means, but it makes me stronger.

Next up was a hosting gig Wednesday at the Palace. Kind of a weird spot as I asked to get on the show. I was half kidding, half saying "Why wasn't I asked to be on this show." The promoter asked if I wanted to host and figured why not. Kinda funny as I was later asked if I wanted to be on the back end of the show. Random as it was the first time I'd been asked in like 3 months. Dang my luck. Anyways the crowd was pretty wild. They didn't want to think and wanted to be apart of the show. I imagine most of them had never been to a comeedy show and just wanted to laugh at fart and dick jokes. Some of the comics did well, others struggled. As a host I got few laughs but I did manage to get some. I wanted to try some jokes but it wasn't a good night for that. We paid a few bucks in tips and that's cool.

Now onto last night. Rowdy crowd. I got on at the Comedy Store on part of a show where the comics bring a party bus. Good on the service but many of the people never have been to a comedy show. I was outside talking with a couple guys and they said they were just hanging out at the bar the bus was leaving from and thought, "Sure well go." They had never been to a comedy show nor really had a clue where it was going. So when I went up there was a lot of talking. Well first the guy before me tried to bring back the host who was too busy hugging babies and shooting a rap video and never returned. Plus the mic stand was broken. So then comics start yelling, "Just bring Jeff up." Sweet easy transition. So I get up there and all I can hear is people talking. I feel like I'm yelling. I was a little stressed before the show because I wanted to do a somewhat clean set because I was recording it. I am in talks with my college to try to do a show next semester. I would feel much better giving them a tape that didn't just talk about sex and whatnot. This crowd would not be receptive to that so I had to essentially be a monkey, let the crowd pull my string, and tell the jokes, clapping my hands and dying inside. I would say I brought the crowd around and by the end heard little to no chatter, but can't say I was happy about it. Basically all the jokes I did I wrote last year, most of them I performed in the half hour I headlined last year. That's pretty deflating. I mess around so much on stage now that I don't work on my jokes like I used to. I'm not comfortable telling a lot of my jokes as some of them I've only told a few times. And with my stumbling problem, I need to stick to jokes I know I can deliver freely. Oh well. I got laughs in a tough environment, whether or not it's a good thing who knows.