Messed up world

So I finally got a job offer. Not a dream job, but a job with a decent company, Home Depot. I'll first give you an insight on how messed up the U.S. is. As I said before I've mailed out over 100 applications and resumes and never got anything good. Welp yesterday I decided to fill out applications at Walmart, Target, Home Depot, and Von's. And with these applications I did not include that I had a college degree. Welp today at 9 am I got a call to interview at Home Depot at 10:40. I went in swooned the fella and got offered the job if I passed the drug test.

Well I don't do drugs, so I headed over and figured I'd drop off some urine and move on.. Whoa nelly it's not that easy. First off, the nurses at that place were the most miserable ppl I've ever met. I'd probably hate my life if I dealt with urine all day too, but come on no need to be a douche for no reason. Anyways, I go to give my first urine sample and forgot she mumbled I cant flush the toilet, and did. She wasnt pleased. I had to do it again. So I went out and pounded a bunch of water and thought I could go. Welp I couldn't strike 2. So the pleasant nurse told me to leave and come back in 2 hours. I didn't know the area so hoped I'd find something to entertain me for a bit. I stumbled upon a Barnes and Nobles and figured I'd head in. God they have so many books. Everyone has a book nowadays, and they have a whole wing dedicated to Sci-Fi and comics, the nerds are taking over. So I tried to find some kind of reading material that will hold me over for a bit. I found a Jim Norton book, he's a pro comic who does a lot of edgy material. His book was even more blue. That is a man that enjoys prostitutes. Anyways I skimmed through for a bit and then headed back to the clinic. Luckily I gave enough piss and left.

I headed home and took a nap. I woke up, drove to Winston's, and put my name in. That place is getting pretty popular, for comics anyways. Tonight was 95% comics, and the rest of the ppl were there to see there friends perform. Those\ are very tough crowds to perform for. I went up 19th out of 25 ppl. Kinda cool getting recognized as being good enough to go up later. But I feel a little more pressure to be good. And I always do new stuff at Winston's so I have no idea if the crowd will like it. Plus I have no idea anymore if a joke is funny. I'm so much in the zone in there and trying to spit out everything I wanna say that I don't even hear laughs. I'm gonna start bringing my tape recorder and place it in the back whenever I go on. That way I'll be able to gauge the crowd's reaction. A few comics said I did well but you can never tell. I tell ppl good job whether or not they sucked, so I could be getting the same treatment. I guess I'll give the performance a C.

Observation of the day: Why the hell are your parents so afraid to let you see the restaurant bill....