Spending time at the Store

Saturday I worked at the Store. They brought their own opener so none of us got to go up. I thought the first guy was pretty funny, kinda awkward but found him funny enough. The 2nd and 3rd comics were unwatchable. The girl recently headliner at the Comedy Palace, and the dude regularly opens for Jeff Garlin. They are terrible, and the worst comics I've seen in that spot to date. People were wondering how long he was doing. His stage presence is almost unwatchable. Both their material was beyond moronic and hacky. I couldn't bare to watch it was so terrible. It was a moment in time where I really thought about quitting, not only the Store, but comedy in general. I don't know if my style will ever work. It's very frustrating, and almost depressing. The headliner was from workaholics. He did a great job knowing how to teeter the inappropriate line, but not going too far. He is also mixed race, and discusses it, but never actually says what he is. I found that a very cool trick to keep the audience on edge. I thought he was my second favorite headliner so far. Sunday at the Store was pretty slow. I went up early as usual. There was a group that wanted to sit in the front, so people could talk to them. I opened my set by chatting with them a bit. It was good and bad. I did ten minutes and it was a roller coaster. I enjoyed it. Monday was the open mic. As always my favorite show of the week. I did more jokes than I normally do, but still chatted with the crowd a bit. I had a guy ask to take a picture with me. That's never happened before other than family. He was there on his birthday which is very weird to me.

Maine, NYC, and back again

So, I've returned home safely from my cross country trip. I have to say it was a good time. I failed at taking a break from drinking. I took one night off and literally was up all night. I in turn headed into NYC for about 8 hours, including seeing the Letterman taping and walking all over Manhattan and Central Park. I overheard a convo from a guy trying to hit on the girl. I couldn't help but laugh. She heard me and chatted in up with me. She was a dance instructor and a member of the ROCK Church over there. It was uplifting that their are pretty, intelligent women out there. I have been doing well with avoiding contact with the ex. I'm sure we'll eventually speak again, but I really have no remorse about leaving her. I wrote letters to the 3 essential women in my life. I really had very few nice things to say about her. I don't know what I feel this hate, but I really have so many negative memories about her. I think I will move past her rather quickly, I hope anyways. I did miss her when I was spending time with family and they were asking about her. But she made it pretty clear that she's already been on multiple dates, including having sex on the first date. This is the same thing Kathy did. I refuse to let myself fall down that kind of path again. I don't know why women can move past me so quickly. It is what it is. I am far from perfect, but I am a good, caring soul. I'll find someone who accepts me for me, and I will be happy. As far as the trip. The Comedy Connection is closed, which appears to be for good. I decided to check out the open mic we showcased at a few years back. It was very poorly run. I approached the guy asking how much time we got or where there was a light. He basically said no light, and 6-8 minutes. I watched as the host sang songs and did 3 minutes between comics. Comics who by the way were doing at least 10 minutes. They were telling random girlfriend jokes. And other rather hacky jokes. When I went up there and tried my bits it just didn't go well. First off the host told the last few comics they basically would have negative time. I got a few chuckles, but was by far not a good set. I walked out the door, licked my wounds, and moved on. It was a case of they were all friends and I was an outsider and didn't have a chance. I could have taken a different approach as it was as open mic but oh well. Next time. Tuesday I did a show in New York at the Creek and Cave. I got lost at first but made it. Had to go to the bathroom, but could not find a public restroom to save my life. Finally went in the basement of this place and lit it up. It was gross. Anyways when I walked in before 8 there looked to be a good crowd. There was a 6,8 and 930 show at this place. Come to find out the 6 show was just an open mic and all the people in the crowd were comics. They filed out rather quickly. There was about 15 people, including comics when I went up. Some jokes did ok. Wasn't a killer set but I was happy with it. The hosts went up together which I thought was a cool thing. That worked well off each other like Jesse and I. Wednesday I did a show in Greenwich Village near the Comedy Cellar. I got lost once again and headed the opposite was even though I was 3 minutes from the place. I had my friend look up directions and I made it. Was a little panicked cause I was suppose to be there by 930, and arrived closer to 935. The dude that put me on seemed to not care about being late. They were suppose to start at 8 but started closer to ten. When I went in there was 7 people in the audience, 3 Americans, 2 people from Holland, and 2 ladies from Venezuela. One girl popped in and left, then 2 girls came in, and left. They have guys outside called "Barkers" that try to convince people to come into the show. I saw them strike out for the most part. I believe they have fun doing it. My set was fun. Jokes didn't work at all, but I had fun doing crowd work. It was tough because basically all of the comics did crowd work. I realized more than ever that I need more relate-able jokes. I wrote 15 pages since I saw gone. Mostly stories about my life, and all the one night stands I've had. Also, I expanded the speed dating joke. I am going to try them next week at the Store. Need to read them over, but I feel confident they will get laughs. Tonight was Winston's. It was nice to return to that stage. I had fun doing the show. There was a decent crowd, not big laughers, but they did enjoy some people. For my set I rambled off a bunch of 80's movies and sitcoms, and made up how I masturbate to them. It got some laughs. I don't know if it would work in a club. I think if they were splattered in a set it would work best. Joke, do one, joke again.

Lotta shows and depression

Well I've been going through a break up with the ex. It was my decision and while I do think it's the right decision for both our futures. It does suck a lot right now. My days are very boring. I just stay in bed, sulk, and try to fight off the urge of drinking. I saw her on Saturday and she looked great. We talked. I thought then it could work, but even then she wasn't asking anything about me, and just ignored what I said. I pretty sure she's also already been intimate with another dude. I think she was just screwing with my head. I had a vivid dream last night that I walked in on her with another guy. I jumped out of bed and contemplating started to drink. I decided to go see her. She let me in, but it was not like Saturday. When I saw her, I smiled, she just said "what?" I asked her about the guy to which she laughed and refused to answer it. We went back and forth for about 15 minutes, and I ended up just leaving. I can soberly not be the first to contact her anymore. She is over me, and I need to strength myself. Drinking is always a problem. I did take a day off and am going to focus on getting away from hard stuff. That is my goal. I head home tomorrow so I want to show the best Jeff I can. As far as shows. Sunday, I believe I followed a dude that does a lot of asian jokes, and I apologized to the person in the front row. The set was then a mixture of crowd work and jokes. I know I did the break up joke and like what has happened before some gal yelled maybe she'll take you back. It was a funish set. Monday was the Store open mic. The crowd was pretty dead as always, and I intended to try a bunch of jokes, but ended up talking with one guy in the front. I had no direction, I opened with how are you, to which a guy that went up earlier, yelled yes from the back. I ended up talking to him for most of my set. I somewhat fell like I'm wasting my and the clubs time when I do that, but no one has told me not to. Tuesday was the Palace competition. I had a somewhat difficult round. 3 people that are funny and have done it longer than me, plus a bringer. It was kinda sketchy as the show was suppose to start at 8, but started at 820. The problem is that most of the bringers people came after 8, and if the show started on time they wouldn't be able to vote. Kinda lame. But I pretty much phoned my set in and didn't advance. I really wasn't that affected. Obviously, I want to advance, but I'm not going to win the thing, and that's all that matters. Next was Til Two. When I arrived there was a good crowd. I've had a tough time the last few times I was there so I was excited. I was the headliner and went up last. I was suppose to do twenty minutes but I saw what I thought was the light but ended up just being a camera flash. I was kinda bummed as I chatted with a comic earlier about doing longer sets. I ended up only doing 13. I did well, but for some reason I just can't catch as break. Wednesday was Winston's then Beachwood. Winston's was pretty dead. Sadly our run of having people come in early has ended. Were talking about moving the contest back to Mondays for the next one but that's a lot of competition. There's already 2 open mics that night on top of the Madhouse contest. I'll get comics, but doubt I can get some that draw, considering the Madhouse contest has such better prizes. Maybe Thursday would be better. I will try to get that date. Beachwood was surprisingly more fun that I had expected. I was on the drink tab so that's always good. Sadly I drank way too much to be driving home. That's really depressing. I am in no way proud of that. My set was fun. Jokes and crowd work were used. I actually accidentally got a table kicked out. That was kind of awkward as the bouncer went over and told them to leave as I'm struggling to make it through. It was kinda funny I went up before a comic I'm far better than but oh well. I get no respect around this town. People said they enjoyed my set. Thursday was the Store and I honestly can't remember how that set went. Friday was Winston's. There was a good amount of people but they did not want to laugh. They were there for the two features. One Mexican and the other PB white boy. The Mexican posted the next day of facebook how the show wasn't what he expected and needed a break. My set was just horrible. I was more sober than I usually am. But I couldn't have felt more miserable on stage. I want to get off right away but I struggled through and that's a skill in itself. A few people did well by just talking to the crowd, but that's all that worked. Saturday was the Store. I got to open the first show to a sold out crowd of 199. It was the most talented line up since I've been working there. All 3 are touring comedians. Steve Simeone, Steve Rannazzisi, and Ari Shaffir. My set went somewhat ok. I expected more from a huge crowd. Some lady said she enjoyed my set. I don't think the guys did as well as I thought they would. If a crowd of 200 can be tough, they were. I closed the show out well which is something I've been working on. Sunday I did a country club in Carlsbad. I made a little money and got some food. I was offered free drinks but the last time I saw the guy I got so wasted I passed out and pissed on his futon. His wife brought it up the first thing. It was really embarrassing and I didn't feel comfortable drinking out front of them. I sat outside and nearly was in tears thinking about my struggle with alcohol. It also brought me back to the show I did at his house was the first time Lindsey and I broke up. Sunday I thought we had a chance to rekindle it, but it's just not meant to be. My set was ok. Started off well, but kind of lost them as I went on. They were a bunch of rich white people. I'm not really great in that environment. I was struggling to think what joke I wanted to do next. Monday was back to the Store open mic. That day I wrote a bunch "do you ever masturbate" insert random show or movie. Some did well, some not so much. After that I tried to remember the redneck and crackas jokes but couldn't for the life of me. I had fun with the set, and think I can filter in those masturbate jokes into another set. Tuesday was Lestat's. I thought I'd get 15 minutes, then I saw I was the feature and thought maybe I'd get 20-30. I text the dude and he says 10-12. Ok then. I don't really mind but goes back to getting some respect. The headliner was running late so I got to do 15 minutes. I was thinking after what jokes I would have went into next. I think at my Comedy Store show I am going to do 25 minutes. It would be a good challenge and I think I can. My set started off strong and trailed off a little bit as I continued. I wasn't happy with the ending but oh well.

Lot of work and some comedy

Sunday was the Store. My set was ok. Wrote like 4 new jokes, and tried 3 of them. One worked, one started ok, the 3rd didn't get much a response. I sprinkled in some old stuff, and closed with some crowd work to end decent. Monday was back at the Store for the open mic. I tried a bunch of jokes, most of them did decent. I worked with the crowd a little bit, and basically just made fun of the night. Tuesday I worked at the Store and did not perform. One of the workers opened the show and did the worse on the show, which is crazy because most of the others were new to comedy. One comic asked if he could film, I said no, he asked why I just said it's policy. When he got on stage I could see his gf sitting weird. I had a feeling she was filming. I went behind her, and sure enough she was. I told her to stop. I don't really care, I just don't like shady people. Wednesday was Winston's. The contest was ok. There were a few people in the audience, and with the new window installed, it adds a different dynamic. People can watch/ heckle from outside. The voting was close. One of the comics stayed until the end, but left right before I brought the comics back on stage. This was a pretty stupid move, as people rarely can remember people's names. He ended up getting 5th place and not advancing. After Winston's I did a set at the Whistle Stop. It was pretty awkward. I followed a sketch. I started off pretty bad, I battled and ended ok but didn't feel good about it. A few of the comics said I did well, but they were just being nice. The comics after me messed around on stage a lot and that seemed to work out much better. One of the bookers told me how the other comics that had opened in month's past had a tough time as well. I talked to the other booker about maybe putting one comic on before the first comic, to ease the crowd into stand up. He pretty much said they do the show for the sketches and don't really care about comedy. They book comics from L.A. to try to make contacts for shows up there. I guess if there's one way to do it, you might as well put on a show you enjoy in exchange for stage time. Thursday was the Store. I went up pretty late into the night and basically did all crowd work. Added a few jokes, but for the most part I talked to a table in the front and made fun of one of the comics that brought most of the people. The crowd was very small. Friday was back at Winston's. There was a decent amount of people in the crowd. I didn't do a set as the comic before me talked about all the lesbians there, as well as eating butt and scissoring. I was too uncomfortable to do jokes. Saturday was back at the Store. First show was somewhat packed. All the comics did really well. Second show was small, about 40 people. Still all the comics did well. The last comic said she was only 30 which I wanted to believe was a lie as she's already headlining but I read an article that she was on about 30 comics to watch under 30. I have to keep plugging away. Talking to one of the comics that lives in L.A. he kept stressing how a move would make so much sense, don't wait. He was saying L.A. is bad for comedy but good if you want to do T.V. and whatnot. I realized San Diego is actually better for stand up than L.A. I really only want to do comedy unless I get a Seinfeld like show where I was head writer or the main star. I don't want to do bit parts here and there. I think a move to L.A. in like April 2014 would be pretty smart. I'd been doing comedy 5 years, and I would be comfortable in all environments, plus Bob will have some establishment there.

Made a few bucks

Still bummed and confused about what happened Monday. Could have really used the $1000 or at least $200 to get a new laptop and the much needed blood tests. I need to get back on track and retake my life. I don't want to struggle my entire life battling with alcoholism. It scares me a little bit. I go back and forth whether I could quit if needed. I believe I could, I simply don't want to. I imagine that's what all alcoholics think. I'm definitely a functioning alcoholic, but drinking every night can't be healthy to say the least. Wednesday was very busy at Winston's. Everyone did well and that was exciting. There was, going back to the open mic, 4 straight women that performed. Not against female comics at all, but I normally space them out as there just isn't a lot of them. The 3 female comics and one gay comic advanced. They just installed a new window that I think has been drawing in a few more random people. After that I went to Bar 11. I was a little drunk and had a hard time on stage. I got some laughs, but struggled and did the worst on the show. Thursday was the Comedy Store. I went up in a prime spot. The manager gave me a little extra time. I was going to mess around but I wanted to keep the show going esp. as I was doing 10 minutes. I'm getting somewhat tired of my jokes. I've been trying to write more, getting tired of my jokes. The weekend headliner popped in. I felt I held my own against him. Friday was Winston's. There was already people there when I arrived. It was a good crowd throughout the night. Some people struggled, but overall if the comic was funny, the crowd laughed. Made a few bucks, which is nice. Saturday was working at the Store. The headliners were old school. Have there sets they've been doing for 15 years and don't mix it up. Just long, hacky stories. The first crowd was the best I've seen in there since I started working there. A girl I used to date showed up with her new fiance. I'm fine with it, although I miss the sex. She was so intense, it was nuts. I had hoped to go up, but one of the headliners brought a friend who opened both shows. She was meh. She even did well the first show. They invited us to perform on their Belly Room shows any Monday we wanted. I have to make it up there at some point.

Really?

Sunday at the Store was a little rough. Went up somewhat early, but just couldn't get a good rhythm going. I tried talking to the crowd, or chat it up with some hot chicks to the left but they wanted nothing to do with it. Monday was the Madhouse finals. It was the first finals I went into thinking I was going to win. After my set, I assumed it was a for sure. Comics on the show and not told me they thought I had it. I closed with having beat box as I rapped. Not sure that hurt me. It would be extremely crazy to think that was hacky. The crowd was smaller than the other finals. So there was a lot of comics and their votes clearly made a difference. I was shocked and angry. I figured it was between me and another comic. When his name was said first I assumed I had it. When my name wasn't called I just left. I felt bad cause a few friends came down from L.A. to watch the show and I didn't say bye. She was somewhat upset, but I don't think she realized the toll it took on me. I still need to talk to the guys that tallied the votes to figure out what happened. Tonight was the Comedy Store. It was a bringer show so I wasn't sure how I'd do. It was meh to say the least. A few people said I did well, and someone jokingly said they didn't like me. It definitely wasn't great. The headliner from L.A. told us basically that we should move to L.A. or New York now because we're starting over. I'm thinking about it more and more. We'll see how I like it when I visit in a month.

Weekend fun

Winston's was a roller show. When I arrived at 630 there was already a decent amount of people in the crowd. I think a few open mic comics brought some people, and the features each brought a couple. Winston's also installed a new window so I wonder if that drew in a few randoms. The show was picking up a nice momentum even through the lightning round. Well Jesse was out of town and I had someone else read out the names. He forgot to read off one name, and since it was the dude's first time and he had a few friends I felt obligated to give him a spot. Well as expected he was pretty terrible and sucked the life out of the show. The dude that went up next did ok ripping on him but as far as jokes, the crowd somewhat was tapped out. My set started off pretty decent, but fell flat with the new jokes I tried. When I got the door money I was sure it was short. The door guy is pretty dumb, but I trust he wouldn't steal. There was one show where they missed out on a $100 bill. I felt this was the case. I spoke with him and he didn't know what I was thinking, and was defensive. I spoke to the bartender/ manager and she kind of blew me off and her douchey bf who was a former doorman tried to give me $5. I almost wanted to take it because he was such a douche. I told her I felt the door was 100$ short, to which she said she didn't think it was that busy. I stood my ground. About 25 minutes later the other doorman gave me $100 bill. I knew it. I smoothed things over with the manager and door guy, but still somewhat sketchy busy, esp. as Jesse wasn't there. Saturday was a pretty stress free show at the Store. Both shows weren't that busy, and the crowds weren't rowdy, esp. with the second show holding a bachelorete party with over 20 women. I got to open the second show when a comic who was supposed to open claimed to be too drunk to go up. It was a weird thing as I assumed I was going to open, then told I wasn't, then 4 minutes before the show I'm told I am going to open. I don't know whether it was just a mind game, who cares. My set started strong, fizzled a bit, then ended decent. One of the owners was there and he said he thought I was funny. Didn't feel good throughout, but I'd say it was good enough for opening. The comics on the show were meh. The feature did the best. His crowd work did well, but his jokes were ok. Had a lot of premises but his actually jokes didn't do that well. The headliner was very cute, but as far as being a headliner I don't see it. Her jokes hit ok, but there was no real build up. She hated on men for the most part, with some weird demands. She clearly dated a lot of comics and was either hurt or hated every moment of it.